Conversation On Staying Quit

A great conversation from back in the day on the forums. One of the best conversations I’ve ever seen about getting and staying quit.

For support, accountability and brotherhood just like this, join our Discord Community today!

ScubaSteve

Any of you guys feel like this is getting harder??? I don’t know what my deal is, if I’m the only one going through a tough time or whatever, but I feel like the initial quit was the easiest part and it has gotten progressively more difficult to stay quit. In fact, the last 24 hours have been the most brutal of my entire quit. Non-stop craves, I tell ya. I realize what’s going on, and I resist it, but it just pisses me off. I stopped for gas this morning and I really wanted to go inside and buy a can. Really, the only thing stopping me was knowing I would either have to a) post up a cave story on here and get reamed by my quit brothers or b ) stop posting and one of you guys would call me and then I’d be embarrassed. That’s the only reason why I didn’t cave in the last 24 hours. It had nothing to do with my word, or my health, or anything other than not wanting to have a bad interaction with some internet personalities I’ve come to appreciate.

In 2 weeks, I’ll be going back to school for the first time in 4 years. I’m really kind of anxious about it because I’ve never had to study in any sense of the word without dip. I know it’s possible, obviously, but part of the reason I did well in school was because I was always in the library studying so that I could dip the whole time. That was my ninja outing from my wife so that she just thought I was studying. I could have done that at home. I’ve got a very short attention span, thanks to a little bit of adult ADD, but I would always put in the extra hours I needed to succeed when I knew I could freely dip in the library without my wife there to heckle me.

Truth is, I don’t have an emergency quit/cave plan. The quit contract thing doesn’t really seem to do it for me. I never printed it out because I just don’t think I would really take it seriously in the event of an imminent cave. I don’t have but a few numbers because I’m not really a phone talking type of guy, and if I was about to cave, I’m probably not going to call anybody anyways. To me, that’s kinda like “attempted” suicide. Those people usually aren’t really trying to do it, they’re just trying to voice it out. I guess my only real “quit plan” is doing this every so often so that you guys realize it’s weighing heavily on my mind. Don’t take this as my quit suicide note, because that’s not my angle. I just do this every couple months to put it on paper and hopefully, in the process, remind myself why I’m here. I know I’m better off without dip.

Wildcat99

Scoob… you are not alone my friend. Now, I will say that the beginning was a HELL of a lot harder for me than it is now (remember, the FOG KING). But, it certainly isn’t easy. I have had your same thoughts in the past and ultimately had the same resolution when the “thought” of caving came. That is exactly why this site works. I can’t cave because I would let down Hyrdo and JustQuit–the two guys who got me to spit out my last dip 576 days ago. I can’t cave because then Jp would be alone in the world. I can’t cave because Trapper won’t have anyone to give shit to about drinking Coors Light (well, I guess he could give Jp shit but you get the point). I can’t cave because Rkymtnmann might possible drive from Denver to KC just to kick me smack dab in the balls. This list goes on… but, one other thought while I am on it— I WON’T cave because I am afraid that my actions might encourage some of YOU other FOQers to just throw up your hands and say, fuck it, I’m done too.

So, it’s all about resolve I suppose… the feelings of anxiety you are having about going back to school without dip are very normal. I had them the first time I played a round of golf without a dip… the first time I took a long road trip without a dip… the first summer on the lake without a dip… the first lawn mowing without a dip… this list actually could go on forever but you get the point there too.

You see, even at close to 600 days, WE still have “issues” with thoughts of caving… I don’t know if that will ever change. I have heard the “hey just have one dip” voice in my ear many times this summer. And, every time I have heard it I told it to liplock the moosecock (or something like that).

As far as that goes… I’ve got more stress in my life right now than I think I have ever had… got some shitty stuff going on around my. There are but a few things holding me together… My wife and kids for one are saving my ass. Constant love and encouragement from them. Believe it or not, this site is helping me too. I’m not nearly as active as i used to be but I’m hear and you turd burglars know I am here. I actually look forward to posting roll every day. In fact, you will notice if you look back that I am a pretty early poster now (cept for this morning due to a late start). I normally post roll right after I get home from the gym. I work out for 2 hours 6 days/week. That is another reason why I won’t cave. I’m in the best physical shape I have ever been in at almost 35 years old. I’ve worked my balls of to get in this shape and no “short term nicotine high” is going to take that away from me!!! My point—find a love for a hobby that involves fitness (if you aren’t already). Set goals and push yourself to hit them. When you reach them, set new ones, and so on. You will find that by doing this you think less and less about nicotine.

Woah, ole’ Wildcat got a little winded there… sorry bout that boyz. Just hang in there Scoob. This is just a little speed bump… the highway opens back up shortly and you’ll be crusing past our next milestone brotha!!

Wordtoyourmother!!!!

WC

Trapper

Scoob,

I think all of us, even at this stage of our quits suffer from occasional craves, rages, oral fixations and what have you. I know i personally have oral fixation issues on a daily basis, its just feels like there should be something in my lip, I’m not necessarily have craves, but my lip is lonely!! These little set backs are short lived, My wife accuses me of being cranky, (dip rage???) I know i have less tolerance for certain things that never used to bother me.(short temper). Like Aaron says i feel these are just speed bumbs, that will occur occasionally as we go on fighting this addiction. I truly believe that these afflictions will grow to be less and less as time goes by, but i also believe as an addict they will always crop up occasionally to remind us of what we are. Your not alone in how you feel stay strong and keep letting your thoughts be known, were in this together and once in a while it helps to chat, like you say just to get it in the open every couple of months.

Trapper

My own personal quit is so reliant on Ape’09 that I would really give up on myself if one of you guys went down. I’m talking about the core-group FOQers, not Terry or Chanilla, etc, but tried and true FOQers. You guys ought to know, if for no other reason than to help keep you quit, that a cave on your part would be detrimental to my quit. Call me a sheep, but a cave from most of you would seriously discount my own reasons for being a quitter.

Like I mentioned before, I couldn’t care less about the health risks, or the costs, etc. Now I just care about keeping quit #1 for my wife and #2 for the FOQers.

Hopefully me staying quit and working through tough temptations like the one I’m in now supply some of you with a little more resolve. I know ya’ll sharing your own experiences has helped me. And for that, I thank you.

niwot

Great discourse fellas!!!! If your posting up you ain’t dippin”!!

Here is my thing..my best friend from college is on the same track I was about 2 years ago…knee deep in work and kids and stress la la la. We are 2 guys that never really dipped until about 5 years ago at age 40 . Now he is “that guy” that fucked around an got addicted. He used to be be a spitter guy now he guts it and chews in front of everybody. He sneaks off and puts one in and I know that little addict thing all too well.

To be with him and see him chew made my quit stronger because I know he is gonna need me and my help to quit, just like I turn to you guys everyday to take comfort knowing I am here and quit and I know you are there and quit.

I fucking hate this disease we all have and I WILL NOT cave ever because I don’t want to be a bitch. I don’t want to go back…I experienced that and know what it is and it is the worst dead end/killer/insidious beast known to man!!

My point is we all need 1 good reason to quit and stay quit. Most of the time mine is my health and not being an addicted bitch. But sometimes I have to think that I am a leader and not a follower and my friend needs to see that you can live without that shit in your grill. Sometimes I post up just for you guys..being an addict gets old and somedays I want to forget that is who I am.

Fight thru the Craves Scoobs and know that me and all the FOQR’s are doing the dame thing.

Did I mention I had one of the worst days in my short life……dip ain’t a consideration cause that will make it worse…I think a glass of wine and an attitude adjustment is in order. I’ll try again tomorrow, knowing I can handle anything with just what I have………no chemicals added–Thank you!!!