One Hundred Days – the Start of My Journey

It all started 13 and a half years ago, one summer day on the basketball court with my step brother. We were out shooting hoops, and he pulled out a can of skoal wintergreen. I’d seen him put in a dip ever since he moved in with us 6 months earlier. I finally asked for one, he gave it to me, my head spun, my stomache was weak, and it was over. I was hooked on an addiction that would lead to me having a dip of copenhagen longcut in my mouth every single moment I that I was awake and not eating. Wake up, grab the can from the night stand and put in a dip. I started at 14, and at 28 it was time to stop.

I’m not sure what lead to it, January 3rd I was chewing up a storm, went to work dipped all day gutting the spit. Came home, watching some TV, surfing the net, stuck in a fresh dip, and just had a thought of how silly it all was. I google’d “Stop dipping”, and I found killthecan.org. From there I found ODT’s site and his cancer pictures, I found the Tom and Jenny Kern story. I started reading some proud quiters H.O.F. speeches.

I wasn’t going to quit, hadn’t thought about quiting, but after what was an initial search to kill some boredom I knew I needed to. I signed up, I signed roll call, and I read everything I could get my hands on. That first week was rough. I couldn’t sleep, my mouth ached, I was angry the whole time. Whenever I thought about dipping though all I had to think about was Tom and Jenny, and my son being on the way. If that didn’t work there was always someone here I could reach out to.

There is no doubt in my mind that without this website I couldn’t have quit. Without this website I wouldn’t have even tried. I owe everyone involved in this website at all a huge thank you. My group has been absolutely awesome, I thank all of you. I was having a rough time at the start, knew I was going out with some friends that night and asked for numbers from my quit brothers. Within 15 minutes I had 4 phone numbers. When my son was born I had 3 people who told me to text them and they would post roll for me. These are people I have never met, but are telling me if I need help I can call or text them at any time, how awesome is that?

Loot~I was going through a funk, and you offered to let me post in your roll call, and you let me know how serious that was. I have been in there everyday since, and seen some of you guys get to 1000 days. Thank you for that, it has been a huge inspiration.

WhoDey~Whether its just letting me vent, talk shit, make fun of you, or whatever you take it all in stride. I don’t think you know how much I like you, I think we are a lot alike.

Tri-Jab~ Early on, before I got close to anyone we were posting together in 0905. Going through the same stuff together, in front of people with almost 1000 day’s quit. It was heady stuff, but it was nice to not be the only one.

Mule~ We’ve had some PM’s, you offered to post roll for me when if I was unable to. I know I can count on you being quit, and being there every day. Knowing that makes me want to do the same thing for you. Thanks for pushing me, and congrats on 100 today as well.

JPine~ Good ol’ JPine.

Chewie~ I have heard how much you put into this site, and put it all together. Thank you for all the work you have done to give us a place to quit.

Sioux~ I bet it was a little strange to have a bunch of new quitters just show up in your group. You took it in stride and welcomed us though. I saw you hit 1000 days, gave you congrats, and you told me you’d be there when I do the same, some along the lines of marking it on your calendar. That meant a lot to me, and made me realize it seems far away but I can do it. See you in 900 days.

Aquaman~ We disagree on politics, but those arguments have helped me keep my mind off of nicotine. I respect you, even though you are wrong.

All the new groups~ You guys can do this. It is important that you do this. Thank you for letting me come into your groups and harass you, push you, challenge you. You need something? Let me know, I have a lot to pay back.

Groups that came before me~ Thank you for showing me it can be done, I go in to your groups, and I can see pages without people talking about nicotine. It shows me and I might even make it multiple days without wanting a chew someday.

My group~ If you were ever in my group, I thank you. I thank everyone who has made it to 100 days with me, and those that are still on their way. I’m accountable to each of you and I don’t ever want to let you down. There are some great quitters in our group, and I couldn’t be in a better group. If you were in our group, and you caved or disappeared I thank you too. That might sound strange, but I thank you for reminding me that this isn’t easy, and if we are still adding days we should be proud.

I know I left people out that deserve my thanks, but this is already longer than I intended for. I hope you don’t feel slighted if you aren’t on this list, there are really a bunch of great people on this site that have contributed to my quit that will never know it.

NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member Sandman32