Battle Won – War FAR From Over

The obligatory HOF beginning:
Age 16 high school baseball – introduced to the weed. Chewing at least weekly. College – chewing daily – the only 5’11’ point guard playing college hoops who dipped. Thought it was cool when I gave our 6’10” center a dip on the way home from a game and he puked all over the van. That made the little dude (me) tougher than the big guy. Here we are 25 years later, about a tin per day. Married, 4 daughters … never a “ninja dipper”. As others have written, if not eating or sleeping – I had a chew in my mouth.

The weed:
Without glamorizing it – nicotine is one helluva drug. All the ideas that we perceive chew “does for us” … it does the opposite.

It enhances???
Concentration, joy, alertness, pleasure, (or it gets rid of) depression, guilt, or pain: All lies. The ONLY thing that the weed does when we take another dip is relieve the withdrawal pains of not having it for the last ½ hour. Therefore it APPEARS to enhance “x” or get rid of “y”. It’s all an illusion. Before we started chewing we could enjoy, concentrate, work, sleep, love, etc without it. Our friends and family who don’t chew can concentrate, work, sleep, love, LIVE without it. It lied to us and told us (me for 25 years) that we couldn’t do all the above without it. But at 100 days I can tell all of you newbies…. The mind can get so used to this drug that even 3 months quit … you still have a hard time without it.

If you are a teenager or in your 20’s … don’t glamorize this stuff! Quit now before it becomes an even deeper part of you. God knows I wish I would have quit in 20 years ago. This has been 100 difficult days! I’m better than I was in February … but sometimes the synapses still don’t seem to click. I guess that is understandable. “Normal” for over 9000 days was when I had nicotine in the blood. I can’t expect the body to feel like it did then. I need to get used to the new “normal”. For the most part – craves are gone … but I still feel “different”. Perhaps it’s easy to blame it on tobacco ….. but I do still feel “off”.

So why quit then?
Simple – If you’re addicted – it controls you…. no matter how you justify it – it controls YOU. How many times have you stressed out when you were down to your last dip and you might not get the next “hit” until late tomorrow morning. It controls you. You are a slave to it. You care more about it than your God and your family. You can go 3 nights without praying … or three nights without your family …. But if you’re addicted to nicotine… one night without the weed and you’re a mess. IT CONTROLS YOU!! That’s why you quit!!! Not because of cancer scares. When you are addicted to nicotine – it is more important than all else. That’s wrong.

Issues
Life is full of “issues”. I’ve seen guys on this site with kid, wife, job, health, etc issues. Chewing tobacco might actually be the least of their issues. Yet, they are trying to tackle it. Have any of you noticed how many dudes are on the members list with less than 5 posts??? MOST OF THEM! Most don’t stay quit because of “issues”. Most sign up – get approved by Chewie – and are gone after one post. Those of you reading this who are newbies with “issues” – I challenge you to be different. Be strong enough to keep posting daily and become a HOFer!!

Have it beat?
Not even close. As “Colonel No Cope” said in his great HOF speech, getting to 100 days means you’ve won a battle, but certainly not the war. Craves will keep coming and I know I can’t let my guard down. Last year I had a quit going of at least 70 days and caved (didn’t know about this site last year).My plan is to keep posting every day until one year quit …. At least until then.

Thanks
My wife and daughters – who have gone through many quits. I thank you for putting up with this one and I pray it is my last. Keep praying for me.

All the June class. Yes, we’re boring l … but diligent and committed. To chewie who talked me off the ledge on day 35. To ScooterScum – for a GREAT HOF speech that I read all the time.

But mostly …. to the “endurance / triathlon club” club on this site. Thanks Mr. Drome who brought me in with his signature … “70.3”. Here are 7 dudes including myself … BBJ, Hydro, ButchTN, rkymtnmn, OD, syndrome, who post every day …. Not only in their quit classes … but also in our very cool “get together”. We’re all trying to get better physically and mentally. It’s truly is amazing … we have this little subgroup of KTC is from PA, SC, TN, CO, IL, MI and me from SoCal ….all over the country. All of us except Jack less than 2 years nicotine free …. all encouraging each other to be nic free and to train hard for our next race. And it goes beyond the training … for all you guys , especially Hydro, sharing in what’s happening with kids and the Church and the Sacraments…. Well it just proves to me the GOD IS BiG and that He can even use stupid ol’ tobacco for good. Good luck with all your upcoming races gents.

Hope:
For Guero (August 09) … may we enjoy Hawaii this summer Copenhagen free.
My non quit friends ….. Mike M, Jeff P, Tim K. Come and join the group!

Thanks Kill The Can. Thank you very much.

Troy – no longer donating to UST

NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member ust25yrdonor