From Ninja Dipping to Freedom – a Quit Story
It’s hard to put into words how much this site has done for me, but here I am about to do it anyway. I was an on/off ninja dipper basically since my senior year of HS. I still remember my first dip. I got so buzzed that I felt nearly drunk. I thought that crap was so amazing. What a fucking tool I was… we all were. We were just tools for Big Tobacco’s profits. I’m proud that we are all fighting those assholes together. Who knew that some liberal immigration lawyer could find so much brotherhood on a site full of ex-dip users? (Yes, I’m fully aware of the demographics of a majority of dippers). Despite the divisions present in our country today, I think it shows that we all have more in common than we might think when we get to know each other.
It seems not that long ago I was some dickhead hiding my dip from my fiancée and going through my late night checklist: (1) Did I rinse/throw away the spitter? (2) Did I hide the can? (3) Did I clean any spills? (4) Did I flush the toilet? Of course, it was only a matter of time I’d get caught, and I did. After the 6th or 7th time getting caught and many half-assed quit attempts, I knew I didn’t want to be a slave to this crap anymore. This place is making that a reality.
It’s time to get real though. WOW, the HOF. I made it here but I haven’t even been to the one in Canton less than an hour away. Anyway, the HOF is a cool milestone, but I believe its name is much loftier than what it actually means. In sports, the HOF is the best of the best. Only a very small fraction make it. Here, it’s just the first of many milestones. It’s like graduating high school. It feels like an accomplishment at first, but then life kicks you in the ass and you realize you have so much to do. You still have to go to college and finish that. Then, once you’re done, you figure out how the hell you’re going to get a job with a degree in Political Science and International Affairs. Since that’s not gonna happen, you might as well go to law school like your dad recommends, and then get a job trying to help people in a system that makes it nearly impossible and discourages you every step of the way! But I digress… the point is that I still have so much work to do. I still get anxious at times and have big cravings. Luckily, the people here make the fight possible. A wise man once said, “quitting is hard, no need to do it alone.” -Me.
Despite the common mantra of ODAAT used by KTC, it’s impossible not to look ahead at least a little bit during one’s quit. Doing so can be a bit discouraging, especially when thinking about having to relearn to do many activities without a cat turd in your lip. Fortunately, reading success stories and talking to quitters who are way further ahead is one of the best ways to help with the quit. It serves as a constant reminder that there IS light at the end of the tunnel. Additionally, I find that hanging in the live chat and forums talking to newer quitters helps reinforce my own quit just as much. So, with that being said, here are some shoutouts to the quitters both above and below me in quit days who have helped me the most in my ongoing journey.
- BluManChew– This fucking guy. Let me show you my first exchange with him as I was on day 4 of my current quit, shortly after I caved for a few days. He was calling out my arrogance for having “Fucking Quit Master” in my member title. Full disclosure, I don’t regret the arrogance (even though I changed it), since it helped to reinforce my quit. I just think this is funny:
Quote:
Hey CleAlt! Didn’t you CAVE not once but twice recently? (please, correct me if I’m mistaken)
And now you are glossing yourself “Fucking Quit Master”??!!
Get fucking real.
Maybe the “Fucking Cave Master” is more fitting for you.
Either way, I’ll let June handle it.
He subsequently messaged me the same day and offered me his digits. He also helped me big time early in my quit with some good motivation that I hadn’t even asked for (because of pride) but definitely needed. Thanks man! (P.S. You were mistaken. I only caved once!)
- Bill W and Ralphie– My fellow quitters from The Land and the only ones I’ve met! These guys are legit! We gotta do at least one Tribe game this summer.
- JB65– Another fellow Clevelander who was instrumental to my early quit days. Thank you and perhaps we will meet one day.
- Evillen– Me and my quit Padawan were damn near parallel when it came to being ninja dippers who hid our addiction from our significant others. Now, our quits are similar too. I think we’ve helped each other a lot. I know you’ll be here shortly and I can’t wait.
- Falcon67– I never even talked to this chick but she posted support for me damn near everyday for most of my quit. Why? Idk. But you’re cool. Thanks.
- Capital 70– A fellow UC Bearcat and Ohioan. You were once a fellow Jackhammer before you caved, but you’re still a quit brother. I always knew you’d be back. Talking to you frequently helps a lot, thanks man.
- Skolvikings and Athan– I don’t think I’ve ever even talked to these guys directly, but I see their posts and they are very helpful. Pretty damn awesome HOF conductors too.
- srohde– The ONLY guy to appreciate the quote from The Office in my signature (WTF guys?). That alone deserves a mention, in addition to the support he provided.
- KenJames– Several weeks ago I bullied this guy into getting his ass to the dentist and now we exchange promises everyday.
- The June Jackhammers– Our group name may be lame, but our quit is not. Thanks to all of you guys, especially the ones in the GroupMe with whom I talk to often. I’m not gonna do names because I don’t want to risk leaving anyone out and you’re all awesome.
- Miscellaneous– Thanks to everyone else who has helped me in my quit directly and indirectly, especially in the live chat (which everyone should use more often) and elsewhere throughout my quit. People like Samrs, Danojeno, HarvestGirl, adropofjam, cmark, RT, kdip, Jivaroan, DaveinMT and so many others I’m probably forgetting. Thank you all.
NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member CLEalt