It’s a Celebration, Bitches! – Confessions of a Superfreak
One year quit under my belt, and feelin’ damn psyched about it!! THAT’s RIGHT!
Like most quitters on here, I’m absolutely astonished at the money, time, and opportunities squandered. Little did I suspect that that first dip of Copenhagen at age 7 would lead to 30 plus years of addiction.
It seems the “every waking moment” theme is one most quitters have in common, and I’m no exception. I dipped while Hunting, while fishing , —everything up to and including reciting Shakespeare. As a youngster I didn’t care; addiction was for the weak. I could quit anytime I wanted; I just wasn’t ready yet.
I’d quit when I joined the Army. Sounded easy enough. Leaving everything I’d ever known behind, surely the habit would fall by the wayside too. I did manage to quit in boot camp, stylin’ and profilin’ in my RPG’s.(Rape Prevention Glasses).WOOOOOO!!! Instead, that 8 week Army mandated quit was what fell by the wayside when I moved across post to be trained in Pershing missiles.
Following a 2 year stint in Germany, I pinned my next quit hopes on college. I would surely quit in college; only a real educated idiot would dip in the hallowed halls of Academia, right? Hell, even $5 per can Copenhagen while studying abroad in Mexico didn’t break my addiction. (In 93 that was an outrageous price!) I ended up dipping my way right through a Masters and teaching certification. Ended up taking the blue collar route – the money was better.
Getting married does it for some, but not for the serious knuckleheads like me. I put quitting off again…this time I’d wait for kids. This wait turned into an agonizing 6 year term before my wife was finally diagnosed with PCOS and given the proper medication. During that 6 years, I prayed many an evening on the back porch following afternoon shift – a 12 of Busch Light in tow, and both jaws loaded down with Red Seal. I would be a great father, if only I had the chance! The pain and frustration were tearing my marriage apart. Finally, the little miracle I had been begging for arrived on January 25, 2005
Well, a man with any sense would have quit right there. After all, you don’t make a bargain with the Big Man, then not live up to your end of the deal. Yet I was still sitting on the couch holding my newborn daughter in one arm and a spitter in the opposite hand. It was around this time that I made some contacts on QS1. The long and the short of that amounted to me still dipping when I was blessed with a second little angel on August 20, 2006 Following the arrival of my second daughter, quitting took on new importance for me, but I just couldn’t seem to deliver that knockout punch and send the bitch to the canvas for good. In the meantime, QS1 gave way to QS2, which would lead to a group of rebels creating QSX.
Those who have known me for a while on here know that I have stumbled along the way, to put it mildly. I sincerely apologize to the quit brothers and sisters that I may have left to their own devices on my own personal journey. I knew all the while that I needed to make more contacts, maybe even meet some of the people behind the screen names. So, last winter when Loot extended an invitation to the Coca-Cola 600 in Charlotte in May, I jumped at the chance to lose my NASCAR virginity and meet some of the Founding Fathers at the same time. Now that was motivation to stay on the straight-and-narrow!!
For those potential quitters browsing the site, or those quitters in the early stages of nicotine withdrawal: If you remember one thing from my rambling, remember this: IT IS SO MUCH EASIER JUST TO STAY QUIT!!!! The alternative is to let more than yourself down; think of your family and quit group. You will never experience another moment’s peace as a dipper once you experience quitting here. You may find yourself pissed off, cussing and throwing things in frustration late at night in the garage, but peace of mind is gone forever. Gracias a Dios!!
(RC crosses himself in accordance with the fine traditions of the Church of Loot).
One more caveat from a medical/dental standpoint. Those of you with receding gums : GET TO A DENTIST NOW!!! Those receding gums are allowing all sorts of particles under your gumline – things you can’t reach by brushing and flossing, things that can lead to root cavities. Trust me on this one – my receding gums and dipping career have recently cost me 5 teeth in my bottom jaw. I’ll be getting fitted for a lower partial next Monday.
SUPPORTING CAST
So many people to thank…I’ll never remember them all.
TRUCKERRICK (from Lite)…My Brotha from Anotha Motha!! Thanks for the late conversations and the drunken phone tag early on in this quit. Nice to know there are still some people on the left coast who lean to the right.
CRIP…aka (PELONCITO)! YOU BASTARD!!! Nobody can consistently make me belly-laugh that hard!! I got your civics lesson swingin’, beeoootch!! Always a pleasure, JH!
APRIL ’07 Jack, Damian, Nickie….you are dedicated individuals I’m proud to have known. Nickie – thanks for reminding me just how important Daddies can be.
MAY ’08….TAKE THAT FUCKER!!!…Maybe it’s Ready’s monkeys, but I can’t help but think of these hooligans when I think of our group. I thank you all for your help in getting here. Couldn’t have done it without you.
QSX FOUNDERS – you guys have done a lot of good for a lot of people.
CHEWIE – thanks for the work on the site, and always reaching out when you’ve seen me lurking in the past…..yet knowing that this is something I have to do for myself.
40 – FAG!! Thanks for that same encouragement coupled with a boot in the ass: “Hey dumbass..what are you doin’?? Quit doin’ this to yourself and to us…now get your ass in here and post Day 1!!”.
LAST BUT CERTAINLY NOT LEAST – I have to thank one more quit brother. Many of us offer our numbers to help our brothers in need – it’s site SOP. There are a few brothers like this guy who go above and beyond the call of duty. This is the type of guy who takes a brother into his home and puts him up for 3 days, showing him a great time at a major sporting event along the way. Thanks again, bro…hope to see you again in May.
….to close…You hear a lot about the concept of self-love on here. You hear that the quit has to be for you; it can’t be about the girlfriend, the wife, or even the kids. You know what – it’s taken me a long time to realize it, but there is a lot of truth to that. This quit is about me, all about me.
As much as I would love for time to stand still, it seems to fly faster each day. As much as I would like to stay 39 forever, with the girls at 4 and 2 1/2….time marches on. This quit is my way of making sure that I will be there for them. I want to help them on that first bike. I want to help them with the homework. I want to teach them to drive that standard. I want to be there to lift them up when life drags them down, and I want to be there in that church to say, “Her Mother and I”.
NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member R.C.
