Nicotine Does Not Discriminate

One thing I learned about nicotine over the past several years is that is does not discriminate.
We are all susceptible to nicotine addiction regardless of race, sex, education, or socioeconomic
status.

My name is Dave and I am a 60 year old white man with a Biology degree and an Occupational
Therapy Degree. I am firmly in the Middle to Upper Middle Class in terms of earning. I also
served as an Army Reservist for 31 years enlisting as a Medic. I took a commission and retired
in 2020 as a Colonel. I share this information to say that in my mind, a person like me would not
be someone who would succumb to Nicotine addiction but I did and to make it worse I dipped
for about 45 years.

With my medical background you would think that I would know better. After earning my biology
degree, I work in Cancer Research for a couple years and saw the patients who were afflicted
with head and neck cancer and still I dipped. As Medic, I saw soldiers who were literally losing
teeth due to dip and still I dipped. As an OT who studied addiction in school and observed it in
practice I should have known better but still I dipped.

I began dipping at 15 while working at a construction job my father got for me over the summer
to keep me out of trouble. My dip of choice was skoal fine cut wintergreen but if I could not get
my hands on it, I would find a substitue. I absolutely hated to be without a can and made sure I
bought enough to ensure there would always be a can available.

I was a very secretive dipper and only a handful of people knew I dipped. My wife knew but she
didnt say anything and I did not dip in front of her until the very end. I have read several of the
HOF speeches from other quitters. Its almost comical how predictable we were in terms of our
behavior. I lived 5 miles from my work place yet it would take me an hour to get home everyday
because I took a circuitous route so that I could dip. I would also tell little white lies about why I
withdrew money in order to support my nicotine addiction. When I stopped dipping in August, a
can of Skoal fine cut wintergreen costs 3.50 to 5.00 a can and I usually bought a roll at a time.

In May of 2022, I stopped drinking alcohol. I simply got sick of waking up tired with a headache
and quesy stomach no matter how much or how little I drank. Drinking was also a big trigger for
my dipping. I had begun dipping in front of my wife at that point and really felt lousy about that. I
did not think I could stop drinking and dipping together so I waited close to 100 days after
stopping drinking to stop dipping. I had just retired and had increased my activity level. On
Saturday 13 August I woke up, had a cup of coffee, and popped in a dip while watching TV with
my wife. I told my wife that I was about to go on a run and oh by the way Im quitting dipping as
of right now. She was understandibly sceptical but as of this writing I have not had a dip since
that day. I did a little over a week on my own and was having some wicked withdrawal
symptoms (insomnia, anxiety, upset stomach. I had no symptoms when I quit alcohol). I found
Kill the can on 23 August 2022 while researching the withdrawal symptoms I was having. I
joined up and have been very happy with the accountability and brotherhood the site offers.

Today is the 148th day without dipping for me. My group was the November nutjobs. Allenran
and Levi were the ones who posted roll in out group and they were great about checking in with
all the members and demanding accountability. Chick was very kind to check in with me early in
my quit and offer support and encouragement. NomoreCope checked in on me out of blue on
day and has remained in contact since. I recently read his HOF speech and he said when he
was having cravings or difficulties he would reach out to quitters in his group and in other
groups. At the risk of sounding like a dick, Im happy that he was having a hard day when he
reached out to me as it meant a lot. He ended up being my conductor when I hopped on the
HOF train from my RV (I was camping in FL. on my HOF day). I have subsequently volunteered
to be a conductor for the January joy riders and I believe staying involved at that level has
strengthened my quit.

I am thankful to Kill the Can and all of the wonderful quitters that I have met over the past 148
days. I realize that the nic bitch is unrelenting and will continue to try to entice me into dipping
again. I have posted every day since joining. Seeing veteran quitters with several thousand
days quit posting daily is a really powerful example that I would like to emulate. One day at a
time.

Wooo Pig soooie…. Go hogs,
Deej

NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan community member deej