Self Realization
I believe there comes a time in most men’s lives, usually around 40 years old when they begin to see people around them (parents, relatives, or friends) that begin to succumb to various ailments. At some point they realize that they are not the bullet proof, Teflon studs that they believed themselves to be in their 20’s or 30’s. They realize that they are human and as such; are subject to the consequences of their actions. You cannot abuse anything, alcohol, drugs, sex, etc. for a long period of time without some consequences. It was the potential consequences of my actions that brought me here.
On June 01, 2010, I quit. I do not know why. Perhaps I always knew I would have to. Perhaps, my precious little girl asking me to stop was the straw that broke the camels back. Perhaps the good lord got tired of my sainted mothers prayers and delivered me a message. I truly do not know.
100 days ago the Quitters Hall of Fame seemed almost unattainable. Now here I am writing my own speech. I am proud as hell of me for having the balls to make it this far, but it also puts into perspective those vets that are 600, 700, 800 days or more. They are the ones that make this site work. I humbly thank each of you. I have no plans to stop posting roll. I have seen far too many fine quitters make the HOF only to lose interest, stop posting roll, and then return to post Day 1.
My long term goal is to stay nicotine free for the rest of my life. I plan to do this one day at a time. My second goal is to be a 600, 700, 800 day guy that makes a difference to the next group of addicts that wonder through and need some encouragement or maybe a swift kick in the ass.
I am now 105 days and counting tobacco-free. I still have cravings. I fight them off with fake, seeds, gum, or whatever I have. It is getting easier each day. I understand my addiction better now than I ever have. This site has scared me, made me laugh, and made me think long and hard about my life and my addiction. But most of all it has given me my life back.
I now know that I will live long enough to cry at my daughters’ weddings. I will someday take my grandchildren fishing. I will someday enjoy my retirement with my beautiful wife. I will grow old. What I won’t do ever again is put that shit in my mouth!
A special thanks to a few people that made a difference to my quit in their own ways. All of the fine quitters in September 2010 (even the Canadians), Chewie the first one to welcome me to the site, JPine the most misunderstood bastard on the entire site, Radtech (fag) you kept me laughing, chickenlegs my brother in blue, Sam Cat a caring supporter, Gator the one good lawyer, NOLAQ Semper Fi, Kdip the steady supporter, MikeA (and your wife) and many, many others. Thank you all for your support and guidance.
God Bless,
Minuteofangle
NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member minuteofangle
