The Life You Save May Be Your Own – EmL’s HOF Speech

I chewed Kodiak for 20 years. The last 5 of those years were maddening and paralyzing cycles of quitting and failing. I was convinced that I was alone, that I was not able to ever quit, and I was the only one who knew. Then I came across this site.

I read a lot and discovered I wasn’t the only one who had lived this life and I started to get pissed off. I also got the support and encouragement that I needed to try. I peeled off the useless patch on my arm and went ‘all in’.

I hated it. I was miserable. But I posted roll. I bitched and moaned, and bitched and moaned some more. There was a lot of encouragement. There was support in just knowing that we were going through similar things together. It wasn’t easy, but it was working.

As time passed I started to learn things about myself and others and I began to understand that while quitting sucked, it was worth it. And it IS worth it. As I walk in the door after a long day of work my mind is at ease. No more worrying if I have enough chew to get through the night, or worse – for me to have one in the morning. No more effort to stash in a safe place so that it won’t be found by kids or my wife. No more freakin’ lame explanations or excuses when it was found. No more “I’ll be right back” in the middle of something infinitely more important, and no more lack of patience when I needed a fix more than my family needed me.

This is only scratching the surface. If you are thinking about quitting know this: That can of tobacco in your pocket is an evil menace. It is the most ruthless and relentless enemy you will face, and you will face it. If you face it today you can win, and feel the pride and reap the rewards of defeating it on your own terms. Everyday you wait you give it that much more strength, and you give up that much more of yourself. If you wait too long you might not be able to win at all.

Come on in and trust us. You can do this.

EmL (Eric)

p.s. Thanks EVERYONE. You know exactly who you are.

NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member EmL