What’s In a Name
There are very few rules that govern the forums or our live chat / Discord server – it was originally called Quit Smokeless EXTREME for a reason. However, one of those rules talks about multiple aliases on the boards essentially saying that they’re not allowed. Every once in a while, this topic is challenged as a silly rule and I wanted to give my thoughts on the subject.
KillTheCan.org is an online space. It exists on the Internet to help people. As with all things virtual, there is a certain level of anonymity that comes with an online space. People can choose to hide behind screen names and create a “virtual self” that allows them to break away from their “real life”. As ACCOUNTABILITY is paramount to our success on the forums, this leads to obvious issues.
When someone fails, we tend to come down VERY hard on that person. This is 100% by design which is why I tell people that our site isn’t for everyone. I also often tell people that we, “Bust balls because we care,” and that’s 100% the truth. There are times when someone fails and they have the following thought process:
- Shit… I caved.
- OK, now I’ve learned my mistakes. I’m ready to get this done.
- Well, I saw what happened when someone else caved, I’m not going through that. I’ll change my screen name.
- I KNOW I’m going to be successful this time, what will it hurt to be there under a different name?
Here’s the issue. As I said before, this house of cards is built on accountability. Whether it’s to a real name or a screen name is irrelevant. People on the boards know “chewie” as the guy who posts WAY too much. But they also know that he’ll have his name on roll call every single day. By the same token, I’m accountable for my actions when I post under that name. I don’t hide and I don’t have another screen name that I post under when I want to be “off the grid”. Why? Cause I know there are people out there that are looking to see my name on a list. And for me that makes all the difference in the world. That simple fact alone has kept me quit for nearly 4 years now.
Failure is a part of life. Unfortunately we see people “try” to quit and fail. I’m a big believer in “whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” and that holds true in the quitting department as well. If you fail you’re going to catch some hell. Don’t run from it. Don’t make that cave a complete failure. LEARN from it. Take you licks and keep on keeping on. Your brothers and sisters will respect you more for it and in the end you’ll be much better off.
