Why I Continue To Post Roll Even at 900 Days
Day 900
I thought I would share a story about why I continue to post roll here even at 900 days. At this point in my quit I don’t think about dip probably 99.9% of the time. It’s not even a thought on my mind. However, the NB will sneak up on you when you aren’t even expecting it.
I was stopped at an intersection and look over to my left at a Gas station/Tobacco Outlet combo store. They have a huge sign outside advertising Copenhagen Wintergreen for cheap (around $4.50/can which is cheap for these parts). And what do you know, I see that sign and the thought “I should go in there and pick up a can” crosses my mind in an instant. Here I am 2 1/2 years nic free and that thought is in my head in an instant. And I hate wintergreen chew and avoided it at all costs when I was using so I have no idea why that particular sign tempted me.
Good thing I had posted roll that morning. And as quickly as that thought had entered my brain, it was gone as I called myself a dumbass for even having it and drove away when the light changed.
Even though I’m not as active on the site as I used to be and even miss roll occasionally, I still find it important to post roll and this is the reason why. If I didn’t have any accountability, perhaps I really would have bought that can? Who knows, but the fact it when the thought crossed my mind, the next thought was “You can’t do that because you posted roll already. You are not allowed to have a dip without permission from July ’12”.
So for you newer guys and folks that hit your 100+ day milestone and are wavering and thinking about stepping away from this place: Don’t do it. Stick around. It takes a minute or two to post roll every morning and while it might not seem like much, it really does mean something when you need it to.
QLF One day at a time fellow quitters.
NOTE: This piece written by KillTheCan.org forum member Kubrick
Unbelievable, after 2 + years and the addiction trigger is still present, that is insane, what other disease that you recover from still comes back to sicken you after a long time?