What To Expect When You Quit Dipping

What To Expect When You Quit Dipping

So you want to quit dipping and you would like to know what to expect when you do. We’re not going to pull any punches around here, it’s tough. That’s why we’re all here. This timeline has been put together over the years with the input of THOUSANDS of quitters. It has been shown to be remarkably accurate from the time you STOP USING NICOTINE.

Days 1 through 3 – Pure hell. You will walk in the fog. Nothing will seem real. Your brain is wondering where the hell its fix is and it is going to punish you until you come up with it. 72 hours, that’s all you need to get the nicotine out of your system. This is where you start to deal with the physical withdrawal associated with quitting dip. Drink lots of water. Read, post, read and post. Don’t take your anger out on your loved ones. We always tell everyone………Make this quit about YOU. If you quit for your wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, kids, mommy or daddy, you will resent them during this period. Quit for yourself and come in here to rant. Yell at us. Bitch at us. We can take it. We’ve been there.

Days 4 through 20 – Here comes the mind games. The nicotine is out of your system now. You will still have some physical things to deal with.

  • Cravings
  • Irritability
  • Insomnia
  • Fatigue
  • Inability to Concentrate
  • Headache
  • Sore throat
  • Constipation, gas, stomach pain
  • Dry mouth
  • Sore tongue and/or gums

Yep, you have this to look forward to. Your brain is rewiring itself. It isn’t used to being in an oxygen rich environment. Your body is responding in kind. Everything is a mind game now. All the cravings you have are actually due to triggers. Triggers are events where you are in a situation you would normally dip in. Mowing the grass, playing poker online, playing golf, working on the car………you get the picture. Keep drinking water, use seeds, the fake stuff, whatever you need to keep the dip out of your mouth. Remember, oral fixation is part of our habit, something you will eventually need to break. For now though, use all the tools you have.

Days 20 – 50 – You’re winning. Life isn’t great, but you probably had a couple of nights where you actually got some sleep. You might notice you’re going to bed earlier than you normally do. Not staying up to get in that last dip. You may notice some sores in your mouth. You’re thinking, “great, I quit dipping and now I have cancer.” You almost certainly don’t. Your mouth is healing itself. Tiny ulcers you’ve had for a long time are healing. We recommend you visit your dentist around the 30 day mark. Don’t be a pansy, just do it. He or she will be very supportive and they can explain the sores much better than we can. Don’t let your guard down. Don’t go out drinking with the fellas or the girls. We also recommend that you don’t drink for at least the first 50 days. Drinking is a huge trigger event and it weakens your resolve.

Days 50 – 70 – Cruise control. Life is really good. You still think about it, but this is good stuff here. Some people may suffer anxiety attacks during or a little before this stage. Some doctors say we dipped to relieve anxiety anyway. Some people can push right through this, others need a little help. Talk to your doctor before you quit or immediately after you quit. They will know what to do. Some give Wellbutrin or Lexapro. Lots of people in the support community take or have taken these medicines and can help you with the affects. Don’t wait till you get to this stage of the game to talk to a doctor. You’ll cruise through this stage much easier if you know how to take care of the anxiety or at least know it’s coming.

Days 70 – 90 – Late term craves, the doldrums, the blahs, the blues. Some people end up feeling like they are right back at day 1. The fog, the haze, the craves. It can be a tough time. You need to let people in your group know this is happening. Time to circle the wagons to get through it. It usually only lasts a few days. Fight through this and make sure your order your HOF Knife or Coin. Here are a couple of articles about this time period which we refer to as “The Funk”

Days 90 – HOF – Houston, resume the countdown. Enjoy the hell out of these last 10 days. You will be celebrating with your group as you all enter the HOF. It is a great feeling and an accomplishment you should not take lightly. Do something special for yourself and your family. They put up with your sorry ass for the last 90 days and they deserve something too.

100+ Days – Stay vigilant. Use the tools you have, to continue beating back any cravings or urges. You will still experience dip dreams and longings, but you are fully qualified to beat them down. Continue to post roll with your group. Get into the newer groups and help somebody out. Pass it along. Live the dream.

Related Reading

Subscribe
Notify of
guest

4.8K Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago

Thanks boys. 5 years. Wow.

I still can’t believe it, I feel as if I never chewed in my life, although the battle scares will be with me for the rest of my life.

I am proud of the battle I won vs the nic bitch, but I didn’t do it alone. Jayp, DDD, shiva,Rick.. I was never alone on my worst days . Just reading posts would help so much. At the time , I was the rookie behind you guys… it helped so much

My wife rocks. Helped quit and was my care taker going through cancer.

The battle is won. My body has rebounded as much as it can

New guys. Just FYI. I always thought the other guy would get sick. Not me

I am also on a throat cancer blog to help others with the battle that i endured

8-14-14

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 297

Congratulations Mr Jeff J today is your 5 year mark!!!. 1825 days. I am drawing a blank here, I usually have a lot to say, just at a loss for words to your great accomplishment. Let’s see if we were kids, you guys Jeff and Jay, would be in fifth grade. Me and shiva would just be finishing first grade. Cheers to another 5 years under your belt. Well Done SIr!!!

!!!!!SPEECH!!!!

and by your request, here is the date of my quit.

October-22-2018

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago

BrotherJeffj,
I wanted to quickly pop in and congratulate you on 5 years clean from the nicotine. I’m happy to see someone from wayyyyy back then, made it with me?
-JP
7-15-14

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago

Let the drum rolls begin…
Congrats Jeff on 5 yr completion :).. Way to go Brother. You are an inspiration to all of us.

Randy
5 years ago

Randy here once again guys. I appreciate the support from your guys comments on the fog, it definetly helps in this scary time. I’m just wondering when the fog would set in for you guys? If I went an hour without a dip then I would get the fog. Was that normal??

Rich Synek
Rich Synek
5 years ago
Reply to  Randy

Randy….if I may add my $.02, when it comes to your quit, there really is no normal as everyone has their own personal experience. That being said, DO NOT overthink things and just let the process take its course. You WILL get through this in due time and keep reminding yourself that with every passing hour, day, and week, you are that much closer to eventual physical/emotional freedom.

Greg
5 years ago

Is tinnitus normal to have for a couple months now?

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Greg

There is a relationship between nicotine and tinnitus I’ve read before. Tho, I believe it was more for smoking?
I’d probably go see a doctor, since medical advice here, should be taken lightly. My guess is it’s nothing serious. I do recall having it when I quit dipping over 5 years ago (still do sometimes)
I also read caffeine use is related to it as well.
-JP
7-15-14

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 290
only 75 days to complete one year and 10 days to hit the third floor, $1667.5 saved . Holey Cow, sounds incredible to be able to say I have not dipped in 290 days. Newbies, you will all be up here and quicker than you think. Keep fighting.
DDD

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

DDD

Wow. A big savings. Jayp and myself. In a few days over $8000.00 in savings from our quit.

Looking at that number. It’s kinda frightening that before I quit, I was throwing money away

Good talk DDD

Countdown begins 74 days and a wake up!
Do me a favor. Put your quit date on your posts. I like to see the progress we all are making

Jeffj
8-14-14

Matt
Matt
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Alright gentleman my battle has finally begun. After 18 yrs of packing my lip with this shit I’m done! I am on day 4 and am feeling it. I did by some mint snuff (made by Oregon chew company) it’s a tacky all mint leave fake chew. Seems to be working great for the habitual putting the pack in the lip. I’m am powering through this, thanks for all the support on here.

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Matt

Matt

Welcome to the suck! Your journey has begun and good for you. You have many veterans here that will help out anyway we can. You first thing to do is admit it will suck .. but. It’s a battle well worth it. Come here often. Wins will be daily.. always put your quit date so u can see each day you have kicked the nic bitches ass..

A few things I did that first month. I ate carrots like a rabbit.
Drink allot of water

Sleep when u can
Walk each day
You can do this

Jeffj
8-14-14

Ted Hamilton
Ted Hamilton
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

I am deciding to quit dipping. I havent smoked in 7years that was a bitch but chewing seems harder for me to quit. I got it down to 1 can every 3 to 4 days im going through but need to stop for myself to be healthier

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Ted Hamilton

Good for you Ted, dump that shit out and get started today. It’s not going to be easy, I won’t lie. But it will be the most selfish and rewarding thing you’ll ever do for yourself.
There are plenty of people on this site to help you too.
Get at it!!
-JP
07-15-14

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Ted Hamilton

Good for you Ted. Dump that shit today and get started. It won’t be easy, I will not lie. However, it is the most selfish and rewarding thing you’ll do for yourself. Plenty of people here to help on this site, get at it!
-JP
7-15-14

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago

JayP & DDD – thanks for writing back.. No way I am going back to nic.. I’ll suck up and bite through this phase.
I think I have crossed the worst of depression and anxiety episode now. My mind was very fragile y’day :(.. Didn’t feel this way after 65 days. I would probably need to get checked for underlying illness.
Somehow, I am also feeling it was a reboot of mind and body.. funnily my wife said I am smelling the same way I use to in the first 3-4 weeks..
This shit is pure evil..

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Shiva

Hang in there man, I had the experience of hyper sensitive episodes for awhile. I would recommend getting something to calm the nerves, I did.

I really think Shiva that Gutha is bad ass. The research I have done makes me conclude, it’s about as addictive chew humans can make.

I think you not only took on the nic bitch, but her brother nic bastard at the same time.

I know u will never give up. Just keep the fight, see a Dr, go for a walk

Jeff
8-14-14

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeffj

Thank you, Jeff. It’s getting better now. I don’t know when it suddenly hit after all these days, I panicked. Mind is a fragile being and something messes up it feels helpless. Good to know, we should never lose guard.
Hey, just a week more for your 5 yr anniversary.. 🙂

Bigdiesel90
Bigdiesel90
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Hey man I have experienced some crazy anxiety thru my quit and your way farther in than I am. I’m Day 57. And I have been doing it one day at a time. I would love to pick your brain on some of what you’ve been experiencing. What’s your quit class I’m in sept 2019. Thanks

Jeff T
Jeff T
5 years ago
Reply to  Bigdiesel90

I had crazy anxiety also. Bad the first 3-4 months but lasted on/off about 9-10 months. Now over 4 years quit and everything is great. Keep going and things will get better. Exercise helped a lot
Jeff T

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago

Day 160 – SOS…

After nearly 2 months of a much better time, my depression, sadness and anxiety are back. Feels really shitty for the last 2 days.. What’s going on? I have taken off from work today 🙁 🙁
Why does it feel like all my brain chemicals have gone for a toss suddenly..

DDD
DDD
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Day 289
Who knows Shiva, maybe the body goes through a “reboot” every once in a while and it’s doing it right now, but it’s missing the NIcotine and other fine ingredients in the whacky tobacky so it starts kicking to remind you to feed the need. Tough it out man! you’re bigger than this. If you go back to it like 4 years ago, you WILL have to go through the quitting pains and sweats once again. Write it out in here like we did in the beginning and literally run or walk until your feet bleed, it’ll keep your mind off of it until it passes. Remember that saying you and Jayp Use “This too shall pass”

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Shiva, at this point, 160 days past…I’m thinking it may be something more than the nicotine causing your pain. I’d probably see a doctor. Not that anything serious is going on, but maybe he/she can prescribe something to take off the edge.
I don’t recall being a 160 days in and still.having those bouts. Although I may have had a day or two of the “suck”…by this time, those should start becoming far in between.
As DDD said, you just gotta muscle through them. This too shall pass ?
But I’m serious about going to get a check over from the doc, you have to be in charge of your own health.
Keep at it!!
-JP
7-15-14

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 285

Hey Randy, my fog lasted for a long time too. Don’t fret, it’s just the brain rewiring itself.
Imagine running the weed wacker over the rose bushes for a couple of days. Massive destruction aint it? Well, the rose bush is our brain and the weed whacker is the Nicotine and other goodies in the tobacco we put in our bodies.
It takes time for the tissue and cells to be repaired or completely bypassing the dead ones. To tell you the truth, I don’t see how that stuff doesn’t just kill us in one swift punch. It is pure poison.
Anyway, here’s what i did around day 120 or so, I was tired of feeling “off” so I started eating oatmeal and fruits in the morning. For lunch I would eat salads and chicken, hated that, but I knew i had to do it. For Dinner, the same thing or just fruits and oatmeal.
I did that for a couple of days and it started working, but very slowly, so here’s the kicker, Why not work out? So I started walking then running, then on my bike and hitting the gym, and I mean Hit it hard until your heart pops out of your chest.
After a couple of days I realized the fog had lifted, but it didn’t happen like from one day to another. It was a gradual process until one day I asked myself “Hey, where the hell is that damned Fog? That’s when the realization kicks in, it is gone.
Also, if you drink, completely let go of that garbage too, at least while you are in training.
Really, it is like training for a marathon, running, wrestling or a boxing match. It is you against the top Heavy weight of the world, Knock his teeth out!!

Try it and tell us your story afterwards.

DDD

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Couldn’t put it a better way DDD. That is definydefi a great blueprint on how to battle the BS fog. Good to see you pulling up the cliff hangers out here
-JP
07-15-14

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

DDD. You always hit the nail on the head!
Amazing
Randy , this group is awesome, for 5 years we have circled the wagons to help each other.

I know I would have never made it without DDD, jayp, shiva. Welcoming me to our awesome team

Jeffj
8-14-14

Randy
5 years ago

How long does brain fog last? I am on 4 months and have had it constant. Can not function.

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Randy

Randy

You should be near the end.. I think mine lasted a good 6 months. I felt drunk. Forgetful, I was a mess. Keep the fight going

Other’s may have a different time frame. Shiva and DDD May have a better time frame, only because They have had the most recent battle with the nic bitch

I can say. It goes away, your brain is the wiring itself, it is a pain , but it’s part of the journey. Hang in there

Jeffj j
8-14-14. 13 days and a wake up and I am with you jayp

Randy
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeffj

Thank you for the reply Jeff. Your fog has cleared and you can now live in sweet mental clarity?? It’s just been so long I started to believe it will never end!!

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Randy

Fog long gone. It just takes some time, I live in complete clarity.

I hope DDD / shiva will ring in..

Jayp… if your around. How long was your fog??

Jeffj
8-14-14

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeffj

Mine lasted about a good 60+days. It’s sucked and something I will always remember. I had so many weird side effects going on there, coupled with anxiety, anger, hell, even some depression I was letting that habit go! As you and DDD alluded to, it does leave. You actually feel it will never let go. Suddenly one day, you start feeling normal.
As DDD said, I started running again, that helped. I cut the processed foods and sugar, that helped. I even started meditation…that worked.
And for some reason, I think even the fake dips helped…at least with the depression side. They weren’t the real thing, but the spit was brown, hahaha!
Think of it as “I got myself into this dam mess, now I got to get myself out”. It sucks, but you got to crawl before you can walk.
This is when I started telling myself “This too, shall pass”.
It does. Sorry if this was more than you asked for, but these new guys like to read, I know I did in my journey!
We’ll see you soon at the 5 year door friend!
-JP
7-15-14

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeffj

12 days Jeff….you got this standing on your head, I have the door open for you!!
-JP
7-1514

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 284
Well, I did not get the job i applied for, sucks, but it’s for the best I am sure, but that’s not why I am here beating your eardrums or in this case, bugging your eyeballs for, rather to let you know of another episode in my saga.
So i get the bad news and I am sitting at my desk compiling it all in, frustrated a little and relieved at the same time since the new job required an arsenal of new skills set which I knew I had to master in very little time.
Anyway, at this point I am ready to go home so finally 5 o’clock rolls in and I am out the door, as i get to the last step before I exit the building, I feel this sense of freedom and guess what comes next? Yep you guessed it, a massive crave to get a huge load of crud in my lip invades me. In the olden days, I would stop by the gas station to purchase beer and the shit after receiving destroying news like the one I got. I would enjoy it enormously, spitting junk all the way home. Well, the nIcotine creeper was right there waiting for me to be down on my luck and on my way home to strike with precision and perfect timing.
I asked a question in another forum to the long time quitters to see if they get these craves and I received a few answers saying that they get very mild thoughts about it, but do not consider them craves anymore.
I have been without nicotine for 284 days and was feeling pretty confident about it, well that episode triggered my defenses to go back up. The enemy is still there lurking and waiting to launch an attack.

Quitters Beware!!!

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 281
It is a Monday, but I thank the Lord that we are still above ground and without the chew. There is sad news all over the nation and the world, but at least we are scoring a victory against a nasty habit. God willing our words in here are interpreted as beacons of hope shining the light in the darkness of tobacco addiction.
You all take care.
Sincerely
DDD

Albiii
Albiii
5 years ago

Dear all
Been clean for 22 days.
Cheers all

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 278
Hey Lynn hang in there and hit the 100 days, as some of us call it the first floor. I am close to the third floor and believe me, it gets better the farther and farther you get from your first day. Chewie is right about not getting over confident at any stage of the quit. I actually caved in on day 99 five years ago. I had to go through those terrible first days and I will not do that again.
Take care.

Lynn Jackson
Lynn Jackson
5 years ago

Day 68 of quitting for me today. Felt last night/ this morning that I was back to square 1 with all of this.

I’m a newbie in the group and Im on the downhill slide towards the finish line. The days before I can tell a huge difference than while I was doing the horrible addiction of dipping of over 5 years

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 274
Good to hear from you Shiva. Jeff just a few more weeks until your 5 year mark, Wow!! JayP Leading the way, we trailing right behind you.
Connor, you still fighting the good fight?
All the others lurking and reading posts keep up the good work, if you haven’t started, today is a good day for it.

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago

Day 145 – last few days have been calm and serene… much calmer in inner mind and I could definitely see the chatter dying down.. does it mean I am now almost out of nic monster hold? :).. I still had one or two pangs every couple of days.. when I say pangs, it is almost a 10 sec thought or wish for a nicotine fix and nothing more than that. I forget after that 10-20 secs later..
DDD- great posts… really enjoying reading your stuff. I look up to you.. keep posting
Jeff- thanks for checking on me, brother. Was a bit busy at work over the last few days and couldn’t post often.
JayP- one of the 2 superheroes (other being Jeff) we look up to.. hope ur doing great..

Shiva

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Shiva

Right on. Keep going, I actually stopped using this site around day 200, then late last year came back. It’s natural, I do hope u stay longer and motivate others and share the different types of chewing tobacco the world offers. I heard the gutso (spelling). Is the hardest one to quit.

My wife and I bought a new house, and besides my quit, moving sucks allot. Just a week ago, I knew where my tools were, my clothes. Now I have an endless sea of boxes, and it’s 107.

Jeff j
8-14-14

I am almost with you jayp

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeffj

Congrats on the new house, Jeff ). I know moving can be tiring. It easily takes couple of months to start feeling like a home.
I’ll be here as much as I can. I am grateful to lot of you folks for helping me to climb out of this shithole and I want to help out as much as I can to other new quitters.
The gutkha is pure evil Jeff. My mouth and gums still burn if I eat spicy food. In my country, cigarette is a taboo for many but most of the people think it is ok to have gutkha and they think it is harmless. 😮

Harish Kumar
Harish Kumar
4 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Hello Shiva
I am from india. I will be 90 days gutkha free on 11th June 20 after seven years of abuse. I still can’t eat home cooked spicy food as I feel burning sensation. U were same symptoms.
Kindly share ur success story aa to after how much time ur mouth healed to eat spicy/hot food.

Harish Kumar
Harish Kumar
4 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Kindly share your email address also. It will be helpful.

Jeff j
Jeff j
5 years ago

Shiva..
Mail call
How are you doing brother?

Jeffj
8-14-14

Connor
Connor
5 years ago

First time poster. Dipped for a several years, 3 cans a week or so (I know not as long as some). I’m 26, went cold turkey I’m currently 53 days in without dip. For some reason this past week has been when I have had the most cravings. Maybe its because I have less things going on right now, so I guess a tip would be to stay busy, pick up a new hobby! I quit when I had a sore throat which i believe helped me through the first week as I had less of a craving when i was sick/sore throat. Gaming has probably been the worst, always threw one in when I was gaming so luckily have gaming much less lately. Just gotta break up the habits you had when you did it. Had some anxiety around the 40 day mark, maybe was unrelated as I have a small history with that, but it subsided after a week. Also its very true about alcohol, it will cause cravings and you might talk yourself into getting “one can, for just one time.” Also i winded down and stretched that last can out which i believe helped with the initial cravings. Good luck to everyone! Its nice saving that $15-$20 bucks a week………..but man, I still miss it. Although I don’t miss hiding it from my girlfriend!

DDD
DDD
5 years ago
Reply to  Connor

Day 272
Hey Connor, welcome to the suck as Jeff calls it. He says that’s how soldiers in the marine core refer to doing the things they hate to do.
In the beginning it is wise to stay away from doing the things that trigger the craves, I did the same thing, but then i realized that i couldn’t just stay away for ever, because that’s who i was, so after a few months into it I started doing my normal things and Ram through the craves. I figured I’d have to face the enemy at some time, so for me I waited until i felt strong enough to go through it. As you mention, gaming is your thing so you’re not going to give that up, just give it sometime and Power through it after a while you’ll see that the craves start going away. Hope that helps, to the rest of you, Stay strong, don’t let it get the best of you.
Enjoy your weekend Fellers!!

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 270
Good Morning fellows, I have only 30 days to reach that third floor. I was just thinking, 5 years ago when Shiva and I cut out to continue “living it up” Indulging on that disgusting mud, but you all kept going specifically JayP and Jeff and i mention them because we started our quit with those dudes. I say dudes, but they are more like mighty gladiators.
You see I imagine it like this, those of us that fell to the ground kept looking up to those that continued the fight like centurions using their shields and swords. parrying, swaying and slashing at the enemy. Some of us on the floor caught our breath, spit on the wound, reached for our helmets and swords and got right back into the battle. The stronger warriors looked down at us and offered their hand to get back up, pat on the back and “get back in there” they yell. So we all did.
It’s a war against a formidable adversary we all have one against us, but it can be defeated, use your defenses and offenses to attack the beast one day at a time until it starts bleeding and eventually you will witness its death. One last word of caution is that we all must continue to be vigilant of it and become sentinels, because like the phoenix, it has the power to raise from the ashes and destroy us.
Stay strong Warriors, Oorah!!

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Nothing like a killer motivation comment from DDD. Awesome.

Rookies. Read this daily.. and there is no way you can fail.. but if you do. Try again.

If I was early in my quit, I would take a picture of this so I can get the motivation to plow through a craving:

DDD. Master of motivation. Master of optimism. Conquering the nic bitch

Jeffj
8-14-14

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Another Great Post DDD!
Feel like it’s halftime at an old HS Championship Football game all over again!
If I was having a tough day with the quit, this post would straighten my ass out!
If I can do anything to help someone get free from this terrible addiction, don’t hesitate to ask.
As you said, we are all in this quit together.
-JP
7-15-14

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 269
Had a job interview yesterday, it’s been a while since I’ve done one of those. Talk about nerve racking. I’ve been in my job for a very long time and hadn’t had to go in front of people and selling myself. I usually sell a new procedure, software or idea to a group of people, also teach college courses, but all of that is different compared to a job interview, why am I telling you all this, well, because in the past I would stuff a huge cud and enjoy the shit out of it before a big event like that. The Nic would calm me down and even give me a flare of better than you asshole. Yesterday without the shit, I had no nicotine armor and shield. What I did instead is i said a prayer to calm me down. Seems like that is working for me, not just for the big events, but also for everyday things. Try it out.

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Amen brother, prayer is good and it works.
The answer is never No. It’s either Yes or Not Yet.
Good post!
-JP
7-15-14

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Good job DDD. Prayer is so much better then a big fatty..

Good luck on the job

I was the same way, glad that shit is behind me

Jeffj
8-14-14

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 268
in 97 days I will have completed my first year of quitting tobacco. Feels kind of like when we started the first hundred days, but this time the countdown is backwards and the physical and psychological symptoms are much different.
If you guys are reading this and wondering if it ever gets better, I am here to tell you that it does. I dipped for about 30+ years, and going through the cleansing process was brutal I am not going to sugar coat it for you, but it can be done.
Anyway, this is my journey and I aint going to preach to you, you know what to do. I am just sharing a little bit of it with you all because it helps me keep my mind off it and hopefully inspire someone out there to break out of the nicotine shackles.
You all have a blessed day.
DDD

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 267

Let’s hear it for JayP, today is his 5th Year (1825 days) away from tobacco!
.
Way to go brother, we following your lead.

DDD

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Hahaha…thanks DDD! I appreciate it. Five years clean today, blew by!
So….had some peeps.out to the house last night around the pool.for the bday, one of the guys, who started to quit, but caved about 4-5 months into his quit, was at the table, with a can of Grizzly. I popped it open and took a wiff….YIKES! I capped it and tossed it on the table and said “I now fully understand what a disgusting habit I quit 5 years ago”. He looked at me and said “5 years….man that went by fast. We were on vacation sharing the fake stuff that summer, Triumph, Hooch, Smokey Mountain, Elicit…I wish I had stayed away”. That’s how it happens….you start dipping again and 5 years blows by. It’s been a journey…I thank this site and all you baddasses on this board! Shiva, DDD and Jeffj…I’m here for you guys, stay strong!
Next up, Jeffj…see you in a month at your 5 year!!
-JP
7-15-14

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

Congrats jayp. You did it!

I remember 5 years ago how We battled to get to day 100, now cruise control for sure. I have a buddy dips cope, no effect on me at all, except how sick he looks with a big fatty sticking out of his mouth. That’s what I looked like.

Anyway. Jayp. I guess your next goal is 10 percent years I am with u 100%

Yes. I am a month away

Jeffj
8-14-14

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeffj

Congrats JayP… :)… 5 years wow… and advanced congrats Jeff :).. just a month away.. I am just 4 years 7 months to catch up :):)..

DDD – I wished I’ll post first for JayP since I am a day ahead of you guys ( technically about half a day ) :).. you beat me to it.. i somehow lost track of days..
BTW, you are going great.. keep it up.. I’m following your footsteps…

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Thanks Jeff and Shiva, 5 years and 2 days now!
I appreciate the congrats, I’m here for you guys, keep plugging away men!
JP
7-15-14

Kurt
Kurt
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

This is day 1 for me and I already hate everyone! Mostly myself for dipping in the first place. I’m using the patch has anyone else has success with that? Great forum btw

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Kurt

My words echo those of Chewie, Kurt.
Gotta really start healing and drop the nicotine all together.
To answer your question. I had 6 months if quit success on Nicorette, 22 years ago. But I went back to it, for another 17!
I honestly think the reason Ive been clean from nicotine now, over 5 years now, is because, I was ready, found this site and I went cold turkey. I don’t ever want to feel that way again!
Get yourself some fake dip, seeds, hard candy and gum, and drop that chemical. Start exercising and pounding the water. It’s GO TIME
Best Wishes!!
-JP

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 263
I wonder what happened to Anupam? Dude, I hope the reason you are not posting is because you are busy and NOT because you went back to it.

To the rest of you guys here’s a bit of good news, yesterday on my drive home I saw those same pesky little drivers cutting in front and instead of throwing monkey wrenches at them (figuratively speaking of course) It did not bother me.

I worked on replacing a kitchen sink garbage disposal and there were no swearing words involved, spiked blood pressure or ANXIETY bouts.
I went to the store to pickup some plumbing items and this guy in front of me was berating that poor cashier. That did bother me a little bit, I don’t see how it wouldn’t bother anyone.
Went to have dinner at a popular restaurant and noticed a car parked outside the doors, I thought, that is odd, Maybe dinner and dash? well whatever, we went in and sat down and started to order. All of the sudden the lady (and I use that term loosely) that was in the car parked outside of the restaurant, storms in and starts Yelling at the working staff, something like “HELLOOO!! I been waiting for my order, I told you I am working and Blah Blah Blah ” apparently she was waiting on her order and previously had talked to them and was waiting for it in the car, but obviously they were taking too long. Geez, patience people.

All of these things happened last night and episode after episode with something in it that would have triggered my Anxiety and Anger, but I remained calm.

Finally went home and went for a run, my legs are on fire this morning, but it’s all good.
I was thinking about all that happened last night and how different I behaved in those situations. The only thing that I have been doing differently is I started running in the evenings after work, I think that has helped so I’m going to continue.
I’ll keep you guys posted.
DDD

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

I’d have to say, exercise is definitely one of the prongs I’ve incorporated in my life to combat anxiety or even the little bit of pinned up aggression we all get inside. It helps for sure. Alcohol & Caffeine are also things that seem to exaberate things as well.
I guess with all the other things, only “you” can control your reaction.
-JP
7-15-14

DDD
DDD
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

Thanks JayP, you are absolutely right. I stopped the caffeine, beer and now eating very healthy so that has helped tremendously. Keep you guys posted.

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 262

Thanks Jeff and JayP for your fast response.
Mind over matter I read somewhere. I think what I am calling anxiety is not really what is described in the journals of medicine. What I experience is more like a bit of controlled rage.
Let’s say, I am at the grocery line and I have a pack of ice cold beer and some steaks in my basket to enjoy right after my trip to the grocery store, some sweet old lady is in line with 50 items in her basket and paying with a check or lose change. Doesn’t that drive you up the wall? Is that anxiety or just getting upset?
Here’s another example, you driving to work in the morning or home in the evening if you like, traffic is crazy like always so you are crawling at 5 miles per hour and slamming on the brakes every 2 minutes. You know the lane next to you ends ahead and so do the drivers hauling ass on it, just to get to the front and merge in front of you. Doesn’t that just blow your gaskets?
Anxiety? maybe, maybe controlled rage? who knows. The point is I used to be calmer before and I think it might have been because under pressure i used to pop a pinch of the snuff and enjoy it. Now with that being gone, there is no shield or cane to lean on. Life is pretty good pretty much all the time, except for those precious moments where your buttons get pushed.

Stay Quit Quitters!, Life without the NIC is worth it.

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

DDD….not sure if that is anxiety or not. YES, anger, I do have a bit more of it and what’s surprising? My Mother told me just a month ago, she felt it got worse after I quit dipping. That’s some weird shit! I don’t know to answer your question, but it’s awfully strange that you are dealing with the same things I am. There has to be a connection to it and the usage of nicotine. Nicotine has been said to calm your nerves…so this is very possible.
I have been reading on different ways to help with what I’m calling “Irritability”.
The dumbest things seem to spike the blood pressure, lol!
It could be anxiety….but anxiety seems to have a more “worrisome” element to it. I have heard depression has anger tied to it and the two (anxiety and depression) are linked…so who the hell knows. When it comes down to it, the trade off for being a little more “bitchy” seems better than being hooked on nicotine..those are my thoughts and opinions.
On your way to floor #3, and then a year, great job my friend!!
-JP
7-15-14

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

DDD – surprisingly I have the same issue.. controlled anger sometimes bordering on the rage domain.. sorry I don’t have a solution yet just wanted to share with you.

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

I remember telling myself when I would get angry. It was like my filter was gone. My usual attitude or patience was definitely gone for awhile. I had a built in filter that I would think a bit before opening my big mouth ( which I am happy to report is back). I went through a period of no filter.

It’s the reboot that jayp talks about.

Remember this is a process. A journey, it to shall pass
( shiva)

I am headed back to Cali.. been In Wisconsin. Chicago for clients. I need to get out of this humidity and back to dry SoCal ( earthquakes )

Jeffj
8-14-14

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

DDD

I was angry during the first 100/200 days. Not all the time, but my fuse was very easy to light. As an addict the fight never ends, it’s a flame that to me degrades over time.

I like your attitude. Own it. Claim it. Recognize what’s happening is very good!

Hang in there. You have done allot. Accomplished something very difficult. The nic bitch is a very determined foe.

Anupam. If you did cave. It’s ok man. Come back. Let us help

Jeffj
8-14-14

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 261
There’s another guy in here named KodiakKeith, he just completed his 365 days. I congratulated him and told him I could not wait until I hit my one year mark too. He said that his anxiety attacks were still present until the 10th month. I am getting close to the 10th month and sure wish they’d go away around that mark. Do any of you remember when the anxiety went away on you all’s quits?
DDD

Jeff T
Jeff T
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

For me the anxiety stopped around 10-12 months and has never happened again

Jeff T

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeff T

We helped each other Jeff, you were only a month behind me and it was great having someone walking thru that dark time with me…you were an important part of my quit.
Crazy to believe we”re both almost 5 years removed…flew by!
I hear ya about afraid to sleep. That was definitely something I dealt with too. Not sure why, I think it was the thought of dying (boom and gloom=anxiety) in your sleep? I could think of a lot worse ways to go out, lol!
I read about a small verse in the Bible that said something like, worry about today, not tomorrow, next week or even next year, that there is enough things to.worry about TODAY. I kind of found a calmness in that scripture. It has helped me to be more focused on the things I face today, since tomorrow, next week.or next year may not ever come. Nothing wrong about being prepared, but try not to worry about shit that hasn’t happened, it may never even happen.
Anyway, rambling again!
Have a great Day Jeff, you keep on, keeping on friend!
-JP
7-15-14

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

You know what guys?? For me it’s the reverse.. I am afraid to wake up.. My anxiety and panic was at its worst during early morning when I was about to wake up.
Days 35-65…. I can never forget.. the anxiety, panic and depression.

It’s much better now.. I still have some problems with anxiety in the mornings though..

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

That’s interesting. I think it affects each individual differently. Seemed mine also would “re-boot” in the morning, upon wakening. But this was when I had my long bout, not during the quit.
Very Informative to hear the others take on it.
-JP

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Mine was spotty. I had a year and a half bout with anxiety before I quit. Never had it in my life, up until then.
Looking back, I had a lot of shit going on in my life at that time…my mind probably just checked out.
Fast forward to my quit, it came back a few times during the 0-120 day mark. My fear was, it was coming back, but it was short lived. I still get hints of it now. I did a lot of research on anxiety and most of the time, it’s yourself that puts you in it. I know this sounds silly, but over thinking, leads to stress, stress leads to worry, worry leads to what ifs, what ifs turn into anxiety. Depression loves anxiety and the two enjoy hanging out. So one can cause the other. The thing is, when you are in that state of mind, you know the way back, you know what you need to do to feel better, you just can’t seem to find the path. It’s a very strange place to be. I personally feel my years of abuse masked my anxiety…hell, I could have always had it.
You may have bouts.with it for the rest of your life DDD. I had too much pride at one time in my life to ask for help, foolish of me when I look back at it now.
You can’t be physically well if your not mentally well ?
Sorry if I went off a bit there ✊
-JP
7-15-14

Carey Rook
Carey Rook
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

Hey Jayp, I’m on day 97 and have been following you and others on here since the start of my quite. You have been a great help for me. Your story of your anxiety before and during your quite is identical to mine. I’ve been experiencing anxiety off and on since I started my quite, but this last week has been brutal to say the least. Anyway, thank you for your input to this forum, you will never know how much you have helps me.

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Carey Rook

Hey Carey, glad my ramblings have reached some people.
Congratulations on almost 100 days free, that’s quite the accomplishment and shouldn’t be taken lightly!
For me, I now know the anxiety I experienced during my quit, was the mind re-wiring itself without the aid of nicotine.
Prior to the quit, it was a lot of stress. I’ve always been able to push thru stress pretty well, I guess it was a bit to much when I had my 1.5 year bout. I made it thru, with some counseling first (to figure out what the hell it was, I thought I was dying). Then some meds and a lot of reading. After arming myself with knowledge and coping methods, I dropped the meds.
I hated being on something for it (pride) and decided to.lose.some.weight and start exercising again, something I neglected for a bit.
After I got.a firm grip on handling it, I then decided to totally make life harder and quit dipping after almost 30 years! And this is where I had some bouts again with it. The only difference this time, I knew how to deal with it and not let it get full blown again. Thankfully, it was short lived.
Any way, I’m happy you found some help in my post,.big, BIG congratulations on 97 days free. I’m very happy for.you, I remember my first 100 like.it was yesterday, Sunday will be 5 years!
It blows by, keep at it!
-JP
7-15-14

Jeff j
Jeff j
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

Good job jayp. I had anxiety for about a year also. At its worse I took some meds at night, for some reason I was afraid of sleeping. My doctor was cool and told me about the nicotine’s chemical structure, and of course that helped. I also read allot and eventually got passed it. I can tell you the nic bitch was quit the challenger.. like a 10 round boxing match with the champ, and we won.

Wow. 5 years man. I am almost there. I remember during our quite 5 years ago, how u coached me up to get to day 100. Now we are close to 5 years.

Jeffj
8-14-14

carey rook
carey rook
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

Thanks JAYP, for the reply… I’m on day 147 now and still quit. After a couple weeks or more of better days, I am going through another round of mild depression, and anxiety… life was looking good again lol. I do think though that the symptoms are becoming further apart now. This sucks sooo bad. I will not go back to dipping though, and would never want to go through this again. thanks

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  Carey Rook

Great going Carey.. I am at day 133 so we can pretty much relate our recovery.. Congrats on the near 100 mark..

And yes JayP, Jeff and DDD.. These guys are truly great and they have been my life support system and for many other quitters.

carey rook
carey rook
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Thank you for replying to me Shiva. I have been fallowing you on here also as I to keep having bouts with morning anxiety and depression… It gets better for me later in the day too. I’m on day 147, and after feeling good since about day 100 I have been feeling like crap for the last couple of days with mild depression, and anxiety. It sucks! Hope you are doing better. thanks again.

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 259
I just realized, I am only 3.1 months shy of a year without any tobacco products. During the big celebration of 4th of July I did not get any big cravings, you see in my mind I associated good outdoor times with tobacco intake. Come to think of it, indoor good times also were associated with this ritual. What a liberating feeling it is, not having to depend on it or even thinking of it anymore. I see what Jeff and Jayp and others talk about when they mention their quit symptoms in terms of years now. It would be very dumb to ever go back to that nasty habit. Thinking back about the “Buzz” and other familiar “satisfying” moments at every tobacco pinch intake, I literally get sick in my stomach, by the way those feelings were created by the nicotine and other goodies penetrating the protecting barrier of your brain, it is designed to keep the brain out of danger, but alcohol and tobacco conveniently are able to override those barriers and go straight into your gray matter. I read somewhere that when we engage in these activities, we are literally going to war with our bodies. It seems that the only way to win this war is to end it and start the restoration process. This site can help you with that and for those of us that are going through it already, hang in there, you are stronger than you think.
Ya’ll take care.

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Good job DDD. You are definitely on your way!

Shiva. Keep going. I promise. It get’s easier..

Jeff
8-14-14

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Good to read where your mind is DDD. You are now at the point I was, where the cravings never seemed.to return, things became much, MUCH easier. It just feels like it was a long time in past. Less than a 100 days until a year clean, that’s awesome! Once you get that year in, the next ones will fly by!
I think Chewie said he was like 6-7 years clean when I started my quit. I was like “man, I sure hope I can get there”…I’m a week away from 5 years…it blew by! I had a guy dipping Grizzly, in my golf cart this weekend…didn’t even phase me….not the slightest.
Those “good old days” are gone. I loved nicotine, I was dam good at abusing it. It’s no longer my MO.
Congrats, it’s great to see you posting still, Jeff, Shiva…I’m proud of all you men!

-JP
7-15-14

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago

Day 128 – Oh my!!! Looks like I am hitting 100+ days funk… Cravings after cravings today morning with the same light headed feeling and also return of fog :(…

This too shall pass

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago

18 Weeks / 126 days – I just realised that I am posting whenever I have a bad day or few bad days. Last couple of days are not very good. The blues returned again today morning and had few periods where I felt like Day 1. I am a bit ok now…
This too shall pass.

Anupam – you there? How is it going?

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 253
Hang in there Michael, you are almost there. I agree with JayP, it seems that by day 50 the mega cravings start fading, then hit 60, 90 and beyond a 100, Don’t let it get the best of you. I bet there are about a 100 lurkers reading and watching these posts, you are already ahead of them. Sooner or later they Will be in your shoes, watch, >>>>>>>You see, it is not a matter of IF, but when. I just hope they quit before they have to.<<<<<<<
Know what I mean?
Stay Strong.

Michael L
Michael L
5 years ago

Day 19

Still hell for me going cold turkey… I have almost been caving in daily, when does the extreme cravings go away?

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Michael L

Michael, I think the extreme cravings start subsiding around the 50 day mark.
Personally, I used the fake dips, seeds, gum, exercise and lots of water to get me through. I will say this over and over and over, the fake dips work. They won’t get rid of your bitchiness, but they’ll fill that void. I used them well into a year….then I just didn’t use them as much. I still have a can, almost 5 years later, of Mint Smokey Mountain. If I want one, I take one. But a can of that stuff now days lasts for probably 2 months. I’d be lucky in the beginning of my quit, if a can of the fake stuff would last a day. Still to this day, if I want one, I take one….but NO MORE NICOTINE…in any form..I’m all done with abusing that junk.
If you absolutely do not want to dip in any form, then by all means, get busy exercising, smashing water and chewing bubble gum, just stay away from the nicotine, NO MORE! Gotta get that mind off idle ?
You need to tap into the inner warrior, we all have one!
Good Luck!
-JP
7-15-14.

Eric F.
Eric F.
5 years ago

I quit the first of the year. It has been almost 7 months without any chew. It wasn’t easy at first, almost seemed impossible. But I pushed through it and it only got easier. Lately though, the past 2 weeks all of a sudden I can’t keep my mind off of it. I almost caved, but I didn’t. Not sure why I’m having daily cravings again. It’s not fun. I thought these days were over. I will stay strong though.

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 249
Hey guys, I read all your posts, Shiva, thanks for checking on me. I am still trucking along, just busy with life. I remember Jayp mentioning that after sometime, he hit the cruise control and hit it. I think I’ve reached that plateau. After 8 months posting almost everyday I am finally able to fly on my own. To answer your question, the white patches and white bump I had in my tongue and gums have disappeared. I was Scared going to the dentist, but I knew I had to do it. Like Jeff says, no one wants to be told one has cancer, but in these cases it is best to know the earliest possible. Once you do it and find out there was nothing to worry about you will be so thankful, mark my words.
Anyway, you guys hang in there and keep posting, I too enjoy hearing other people’s stories.

Chad
Chad
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Hello I am having my first quit day this weekend I have been slowing down all week.

Has anyone ever experienced a soreness on adams apple and swollen lymph nodes? I am nervous about it being a very bad case scenario and will be getting it checked but it’ll be roughly a month until I actually get seen for it so was wondering if anyone has experienced similar issues.

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Chad

Chad
You are about to embark on a great adventure. Quitting will be hard make no mistake, but as u have seen allot of us have done it; jayp is at 5 years , I am almost at 5. . Shiva. DDD are on cruise control well over 100 and 200 days.

Come here often and rant or ask questions, you will have allot of support.

It’s good u made the appointment for dr visit, you are taking all the right moves.

The nic bitch will be your challenger, she will be a tough opponent for a month or so, are you tougher? I think so. That’s why u are here.
Jeffj
8-14-14

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago

Week 17

After 30-35 days of great recovery, I had a little reminder yesterday of how it was during withdrawal. I went into a depressed state for a few hours with no feelings of happiness, enthusiasm and had mild anxiety. Like I said, it reminded me how it was in the recovery phase and why one should never go back.
I had a very weird dream. I was smoking and something in my dream said it was my 2nd cigarette in the last 120 days. While smoking I also saw a man getting electrocuted and I went and saved him :O…
This Nic bitch has screwed up both my conscious and sub conscious mind :(.

BTW, I still have a leukoplakia white patch in my gums under my lower left set of canine and premolar teeth (where I used to put my dip). I was hoping it will heal in 4 months but it hasn’t yet. How long does it usually take to heal? (assuming it is not something “C” ).

Shiva

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Needless to say I am scared shit to go to a dentist 🙂 🙂 (haven’t cleaned my teeth yet after my quit)

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Shiva, great to hear you’re still recovering. Yes, that leukoplakia hangs out for a bit. I still have evidence of it almost 5 years out. It does get worse if I use salty sunflower seeds or even some of the fake stuff, which I still rarely use.
It definitely DOES look better than it did when I used tobacco though.
I’m going to say, because it would otherwise be irresponsible, go to the dentist and get it checked out. I’m not a doctor, dentist or psychic…but the chances of.cancer are low. You will feel a helluva lot better too.
Take care, this too, shall pass ?
-JP
7-15-14

Jeff j
Jeff j
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Shiva

Good job in your quit so far, you are doing great.

Been thinking about if I should respond to your fears. As you know. I am a cancer survivor, I owned my cancer and yes it’s the hardest thing to handle, as least it was for me. No human wants to hear the news “ yes, you have cancer”

I would listen to what jayp said, and recommend going to the dentist when you feel it’s the time to go. If you have so much anxiety … make an appointment and see what the status is. Wish I could sugar coat it

More then likely your fine, and it will give you some peace.
Jayp

Countdown on your 5 years.
Jeffj
8-14-14

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeff j

Hey Jeff,
Good to read your response as well. I think your attitude towards owning cancer is the best approach. You know, I told my family when I had some scares along the way, “No excuses if I found out I had something”.
The only thing you can do is get through it and move forward. I am very happy to read your positive takes on this….when you could have said screw it, I’m going back to the shit that caused it. You’ve got a great attitude my friend!
On a positive note, YES! The countdown to.five years (and.beyond) free, is.fastly approaching for both of us….time has.blown by!
I will be back to support you and the rest.of the quitters.
And….if I ever make it to Southern Cali, I will look you up. I told you, I’m saving that trip for Michigan getting back to the Rose Bowl. Someday….LOL!
Take care my friend(s)
-JP
7-15-14

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

Yes. Me too. I am all go blue. I was born in Dearborn, moved to Denver . I stayed in Denver 40. Moved to southern cal in 2009. Maybe Michigan can win the college World Series!

If Michigan can beat Ohio state. Maybe finally we can do the rose bowl. We will need to meet if they do!

Congrats on your 5 years, yes. It went quick, glad those days are behind me to be honest and looking for the future

Jeffj
8-14-14

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeffj

Thanks Jeff and JayP. I will probably go to a dentist this week Not a visit looking forward to but let me take the plunge…
Next time I come to South Cali, God willing, we should meet up…
5 years is a huge milestone. Congrats to you guys..

DDD – How you doing?

Noah
Noah
5 years ago

Day 63 for me. Things are going well. I’m going to the dentist tomorrow and I gotta be honest I’m scared to death. I only dipped for 2 1/2 years which isn’t very long but still too long. I’ve had a mark on my upper gum on the opposite side of where I placed my dip. The mark isn’t white it’s basically the color of my gums but is a bit paler. It’s not soft or velvety, it’s pretty hard and it doesn’t grow it seems kind of like a skin tag. It’s really freaked me out and tomorrow will hopefully resolve this situation. Of course like an idiot I’ve been self diagnosing my self for 9 weeks on the internet and have expected the worse because of it. Keep deciding to quit everyday and remember I and everyone else on here quits with you.

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Hang in there Anupam (EXCELLENT), you have this site to help, when things get tough on your quit follow our lead. I am on day 242, Shiva is over a hundred days, Jayp and Jeff are close to 5 years, but we all started together, Shiva and I relapsed but we all went through those first days like you. Be a tough hombre.

Anupam
Anupam
5 years ago

Travelling to US is really helping me to get rid of this poison. I am really scared that I am going back to india next month . My actual task will start then !

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  Anupam

you’ll have a very difficult time. Make no mistake since all your dip memories would have been associated with your place. Your brain will try to rationalize and will desperately try to relapse. The questions is you need your conscious brain to ask “Do I need to put a dip in to feel normal? Did God really intend to create humans and other animals in such a way? You know the answer is a resounding NO”

When you are feeling down and out, say it aloud “This too shall pass…. ”
When you are on the edge of falling, say it around, “Not Today ….”

Take 3 deep and mindful breath whenever the craving hits hard and post here…

DDD
DDD
5 years ago
Reply to  Anupam

Hang in there Anupam (EXCELLENT), you have this site to help, when things get tough on your quit follow our lead. I am on day 242, Shiva is over a hundred days, Jayp and Jeff are close to 5 years, but we all started together, Shiva and I relapsed but we all went through those first days like you. Be a tough hombre.

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Anupam

Anupam

Mail call! How are you doing?

Jeffj
8-14-14

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 241
Wow! after reading ya’lls stories, it makes my spitting days seem moderate in Intensity. I think I might have gone to sleep with the cud in my lip maybe 4 or 5 times total. I did it for over 25 years though. My style was fast and furious, I would dip for maybe up to 20 minutes at the most, but reloaded quite often during the day, brushed my teeth more than 3 times a day and never woke up to take a dip. The addiction though was just as bad. It took me 2 times to finally stay quit. I realize I can go back to it at anytime if I get careless, but so far I am doing pretty good and there are no plans to ever go back.
Ya’ll stay quit.

Rick
Rick
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

DDD – Do your gums look better ( no dark spots) since you stopped?

Jeff j
Jeff j
5 years ago
Reply to  Rick

Rick from 5 years ago?

Jeff
8-14-14

DDD
DDD
5 years ago
Reply to  Rick

Absolutely, in my case I even had white patches and a white lump that scared the mess out of me, it would not go away, but i continued dipping until I had enough. My gums were bleeding, gaps between my teeth started to get wider, those patches and white bump finally scared me enough to go to the dentist, after i was told not to worry, i did not take that advise and quit instead. Today is day 142 and I am staying quit. Hope that helps Rick.

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Rick

Rick, gums are still receded, my understanding is, once you lose them, it’s like losing a finger, they don’t grow back!
No dark spots, I never had those, but like DDD, I had white patches (leukoplakia). While that is much less now, when I eat seeds or take a fake dip (yes, I have never told myself no if I wanted a fake dip), the white patch seems to be there. I’ve read that anything between your cheek and gums will cause this.
But overall, my mouth and teeth are Great!
In fact I had a dental appointment this morning and my hygentist said this to me.
That’s another nice benefit of NOT dipping….no more “window dressing” the mouth for my dental appointment ?
All this aside, today is a great day to get started on your quit, get at it!
-JP
7-15-14

Anupam
Anupam
5 years ago

Yes jeff. It’s exactly the same dip (reddish when you spit) Really addictive, I used to dip 8-10 pouches daily. Thank you jeff for checking on me.

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Anupam

Heard that’s some bad ass stuff. Keep fighting man

Jeffj
8-14-14

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 240
The saga of an ex-dipper continues. The trajectory has lasted for 8 months like a sine wave with its ups and downs, but seems that the ups are more of the norm now.
It’s good to hear from all of you guys.
Shiva back home with over a hundred days under his belt, Jeff rocking this board and helping as many as he can and Rockstar Jayp popping in once in a while thundering with his mighty 4+ years of quit.
To anyone reading these posts and want to quit, today is a good day for it, for others that are already in their journey, keep going, this is one of the biggest challenges of your life, show yourself and the world that you are mightier than a puny little plant full of carcinogens.

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Good going DDD.. Awesome… Speaking in scientific terms, the amplitude of the sine wave is much less now and sooner or later it will be a flat line :).. I read an article in verywellmind that you need to really give it a year to most of the nic memories….

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Exactly! I never think about a dip at all. All the old triggers (golf, restore my classic car ,mowing ) are gone. I feel as though I never chewed
Almost 5 years! I also know me. If I did ever take a dip I would be hooked. I see Copenhagen at 7-11. Doesn’t phase me anymore

After one year. I was pretty much over the shit.

I just read the comments here to and remind myself then pure hell and I don’t want to ever do it again

I come in this board and I do remember the journey and with all my friends help rookies

8-14-14
Jeffj

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeffj

I’m with you Jeff, almost 5 years free, as I sit here at my office desk and type, I don’t have any dipping wants or needs. Rewind 5 years ago, I would have woke up, popped in a dip. Spit it out, ate breakfast, brushed teeth, popped in another. Drove to the office, spit it out, got to my desk, popped in another. Shift thru emails, called customers back, tidy up my desk before lunch, spit that one out. Go to lunch, eat, pop another back in, go back to the office. Spit it out before meetings (or maybe I’d get a cup with a straw and pretend I was taking a sip, but use it as a spitter and hide it during the meeting). Finish meeting, pop in another at the desk until quitting time. Get home, spit it out, grab a before dinner snack, then pop another in before dinner. Dinner time, spit it out, eat, put in another, go mow the lawn, house project, work on my car. Spit it out, snack, brush teeth, pop another one in before bed….fall asleep with the dam thing in my mouth, because, you know, nicotine is so soothing it helps put you to sleep. Wake up around 2am, dip all over my chest, cheek all friggin wrinkled from dipping app day and sleeping with it in. Rinse mouth, brush teeth, try to fall asleep again without the aid of nicotine. Wake up, repeat.
It’s amazing how much this shit was part of my life, spilt spitters, stained teeth, clothing and car interior. I am so happy I don’t have this bullshit habit/crutch/leash anymore in my life.
I see people dipping these days or a can in the store or smell it….it no longer bothers me. In fact, I can finally see how disgusting this habit really is.
You guys keep at this quit, like Jeff, I know the minute I get caught slipping and pop one in, I will start all over again. Quit means Quit.
DDD, Shiva and the new fellahs, keep at it, don’t get caught up!
-JP
7-15-14

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

Exactly how I was: I even would get up at 2 am to take a dip and watch tv for an hour.l, then go back to bed.

Holy shit. It controlled me!

I would use the straw and cup also in meetings. I must have looked so unprofessional.

But. It owned my ass

When I see someone dip, it’s funny how they think nobody notices the shit .

Well. That’s behind me, I am glad I went through the journey so I can help others.

It’s getting close jayp to your 5 years. The time went by pretty quick. Good job

Jeffj
8-14-14

Rick
Rick
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

Hi Jayp – I’m going to stop dipping. I have a question for you. After 5 years of no dip, did your gums look normal? Thank you very much.

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago

Day 111 – Back to base…. After another 10000 miles and 24 hrs travel. Meeting wife and kid after a month :)…
Had a very open conversation with my wife and I wanted to take time to thank her for everything she did for me over the last 4 months.. Without her support, I am not sure I would have reached this stage..

Jeff, JayP and DDD – as usual you guys are rockstars.. Keep the good work going…
I’ll continue to post here on my progress as well as helping newbies..

Love all….

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Glad you made it back to your home base. I love the conversation with your wife. I did the same thing, she was with me though that journey: of course when I got cancer she never gave up on me:

Shiva. Good job brother, keep rocking

I have been doing my best with the rookies you and DDD. Jayp have been allot help. We have a new group fighting and we all wish them well

Read shiva’s hof rookies. It will motivate you

Jeff
8-14-14

Michael L
Michael L
5 years ago

Day 4
Well I just got past the 72 hour mark. Chewed for 17 years, and this is the longest I have been without nicotine. I quit cold turkey 6/10/19.

Jeff j
Jeff j
5 years ago
Reply to  Michael L

Michael

Welcome to the suck!! Congratulations at your 72 hour mark! It’s is a difficult time, it’s not easy, the best advice is to have small victories… each hour and each day.

I know the process and one of the beat tools for me was carrots for some reason. I ate them like a crazy rabbit. But it helped me allot

Come her often. Many veterans here to help. Ask questions. Bitch and moan.

Jeff j
8-14-14

Raymond
Raymond
5 years ago
Reply to  Michael L

Been a can a day guy for 20 years now. After going through 2x full cans of Cope Snuff in one day, my gums and mouth turned white, raw and hurting. This made me disgusted with myself. I threw away what was left of that can on the night of 6/14.
Now 72 hours has passed, my head hurts, My brain keeps trying to come up with some crazy deceiving reasons why I want that can of Copenhagen. It’s not easy. Just have to keep reminding myself, that’s the nicotine sickness talking. It’s bizarre isn’t it? A chemical can control your wants, desires and emotions. That’s why we have to be men/women, stand up to this invader we let into our bodies and brains and just fight back. What ever reason you give yourself to just get one more taste, that’s the nicotine talking. Remember that. Stay strong. You don’t need dependency on anything in the world but yourself.

Jeff
Jeff
5 years ago
Reply to  Raymond

Raymond

You are exactly right. It’s the nic bitch. And she will
Torture you. Torment you, use the tools here and keep pushing back: We all know it’s hard, but you have to commit to going all the way.

I did it cold turkey also. Copenhagen man myself, but don’t be fooled…

You used job is to get a daily victory. Keep going

My wife have me carrots and for me. It worked

Just don’t give up… many of us will help you

Jeff
8-14-14

Jeff j
Jeff j
5 years ago
Reply to  Michael L

Michael. Your in a journey that at the end will be worth it. Can you stand the fight? It’s nit easy but many of us have done it.

Keep coming here… keep up The victories

8-14-14

Jeff

Adam0
Adam0
5 years ago
Reply to  Michael L

Good Job!! Quit on the Army’s bday!! 4 days but everything will get better

Joel Isaacson
Joel Isaacson
5 years ago

I have to say this group has helped me as well. Even though I have never posted, it never stopped me from looking. I started dipping before I joined the army. I was 3 cans a day when I got out. Everything revolved around dip nonstop! The VA harrassed the daylights out of me to take a cessation class. I begrudgingly went. The intake nurse was nice enough , a 20 year nurse on her way to retirement.
She asked me what I was going to do. Of course I said ,” I’m going to put a dip in as soon as I get to the car. “ She immediately told me our appointment was through. On the way out the door she said,” It’s okay to quit”. That resonated with me. 3 days later I tried to stop. I made it up to 10 pm. I put a dip in. My daughter said daddy I thought you were going to quit. Once again, no dip till about 9:30 the craving was overwhelming. Instead of a dip, I took a sleeping pill. Out like a light. That was day one of no dip. Hard to believe that was over 2 years ago. I still remain dip free!

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Joel Isaacson

Joel

Good job. I was in the USMC. I didn’t even go to the class.

This board is amazing, when jayp.. ddd. Shiva. Steve and Rick started our quit in 2014. None of us joined a group. I for one. Never could figure it out, so I hung out in the board

It’s great to know, behind the scenes we helped

Always good to have fellow veteran in the group.. reach out to rookies if u have time

Happy USA birthday today. 244

Jeff j
8-14-14

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  Joel Isaacson

that’s awesome Joel.. congrats

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Congratulations! You did it Shiva 100 day mark is passed. Aint no looking back, now go for your 200.
Good HOF too, very insightful info.

Los
Los
5 years ago

I used to dip in college. Quit for 7 years and was fine. Had one chew and I got hooked again. Been doing for 15 months in secret , then my gf caught me. She’s sad that I’ve been lying to her.

I’m 48 hours in on my 2nd (and final) quit. It’s hell, but I know I’ve done it before. Want to be free again like I once was.

Anupam
Anupam
5 years ago

Hats of Jp sir

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Anupam

Anupam

Mail call. How are you doing? Keep me updated.

Hang in there

Jeffj
8-14-14

Anupam
Anupam
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeffj

Hello jeff.
I am doing good . How are you sir ?
It’s my 27th day today . My gums aren’t hurting anymore but my craving for tobacco is increasing day by day. For the first seven days i was feeling lot better than now. Infact I am craving more than ever. I do not know why this is happening. And as you suggested no alcohol from past 10 days. Apart that, i feel lazy at most of the times . All this is happening to me in this week.

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Anupam

Hey man. Happy b day. It’s part of the process, look how far you have done already.. great accomplishment! Almost 30 days! That’s great.

As shiva said in his HOF. It’s comes in waves

Hang in there. Let’s hit June 14. That will be 30 days

Jeffj
8-14-14

Anupam
Anupam
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeffj

Jeff ,
I am here . I am still here ?
Feeling really proud for completing one month with no tobacco.
For now , not really craving that much . But whenever I eat something spicy , my body needs that. My stomach is all good now ?. No more pain in gums.
Thank you jeff for the mail call. I went to outer bank last weekend. It’s so wonderful. Loved being there for two nights. Today I was on call with my friend from india. I asked what are you doing ? He cut the call and sent me the pic of “rajnigandha tulsi “(tobacco pouch i used to dip, shiva might know that ) ? He is so bad. ??

Jeff j
Jeff j
5 years ago
Reply to  Anupam

Awesome. Good job man. Over a month! Congratulations. Let he to month 2

Yes. I know. After eating was a big trigger. But you have the tools to kick butt

I read about a dip in India that is reddish when u spit. Is that it? Highly addicting I heard

Jeffj
8-14-14

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeff j

Yes Jeff, it is called “Gutka”. This is very prevalent in South Asia and South East Asia. It is a mixture of Tobacco, Areca nut, Slaked lime, Paraffin and Catechu. This is easily one of the most “evilest” substance ever invented. The composition is a perfect art of nicotine delivery and it provides a massive addiction. I was the worst… Smoking as well as addicted to Gutka..
It wasn’t easy coming out of it..

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Anupam

Anupam

Mail
Call. Talk to me. How is it going?

Jeff
8-14-14

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago

Day 100 – Woo hoo 🙂 🙂 :)… Here’s my HOF speech…

The first emotion I am feeling is “Surprised”. Frankly, I am surprised that I have reached till here given the withdrawals I had till probably Day 80.

A very big thanks to my quit buddies here, JayP, Jeff and DDD. You guys are a big inspiration to me who never let me down. Thank you all. Jeff, special thanks to you man.. I hope I find Steve and Rick again.
Thanks to everyone who pitched in when I was down and out.

A big thanks to my family who put up with my sorry ass for the last 100 days. Unfortunately, I am 1000s of miles away from them and the celebrations have to wait a few more days.

Few common experiences that I want to share to freshers.

1. Recovery is not linear and it happens in waves and stages. You have to be patient.
2. I was both a smoker and dipper and I suffered one of the worst withdrawal periods.
3. There are lot of literature that says you get better from 3rd week onwards. Thats BS for the most part. The mind games started from week 3 and I went through worst anxiety/depression/sadness from week 3 till week 7.
4. Anxiety and depression were the worst withdrawal symptoms for me. It started getting better only around day 80.
5. This too shall pass…… and not today.. Keep this in your mind and take 1 day at a time.
6. A very interesting article I read. When you are addicted your neuro chemistry changes and brain develops circuits for craving. When you start cessation, there is no nicotine to inhibit the cravings. Brain slowly develops a counter circuit which inhibits this craving and maintains homeostasis. Why understanding this is important? I’ll tell you why. This is because the craving circuit never goes away once you are an addict. Brain simply puts a counter measure to control / fade the craving. Once you put nicotine back into your body, brain simply disassembles the counter circuit since nicotine is already there to inhibit the craving and having another counter circuit will throw away the homeostasis. So, you get the point right? If you put nicotine back (even 1 dip or 1 smoke), you’ll be back to your usual intake of addiction. There is no stopping.
7. Does the support from family matters? The quit is for you but family support matters a lot. There are lot of times in the 2 months following your quit date, you’ll be an a***hole. You will be unreasonable and you may take it out on your close ones. Be patient and have few heart-to-heart discussions with your wife. Make them read through some of the literature so that they understand what you are going through. More importantly, apologize for any outbursts even if you feel the fault is not with you.
8. Remember, your neuro transmitters are out of whack. Your brain does not have on-off switch and it takes a few months to get back to normal.

9. Remember “Quitting is not an event, it is a process”.

Thanks
Shiva

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

congratulations shiva. You did it! Awesome speech

Jeffj
8-14-14

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Congrats hitting 100 again Shiva! I think you now understand the work it is to be done with this horrible habit. I’m happy you came back and put in the work. Quitting, like exercising and eating healthy, is a lifestyle, not something you can hobby with.
Your explanation in #6 is spot on…I found that very interesting and explains why nicotine cannot just be used casually. Thank you for sharing that.
You are well on to the second floor now. Pop in, help others, I did this through 250 days… maybe even 300. Hell, I’m still around here barking in the wind almost 5 years later!
Congratulations Shiva!!
-JP
7-15-14

Anupam
Anupam
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Congratulations shiva ??.

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Shiva,
Mail Call, what’s been going on?
You been quiet after the HOF, checking in on you.
-JP

Shiva
Shiva
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

JayP – I am fine and thanks for checking for me. I am travelling back tomorrow so was bit held up in closing few things..
Again another 10,000 miles and 24 hr journey 🙂 🙂

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Shiva

Glad to hear Shiva! Safe travels home, look forward to seeing you posting out here. Be well!

DDD
DDD
5 years ago

Day 228
Good to see all the Quitting gang together again and now a new member kicking butt, Welcome to the “Suck” Anupam. Jeff, JayP, Shiva thanks for pitching in, I thought I would have to do this all by myself. Shiva you are almost there, only 2 days dude, give them hell. Do you guys (Jeff and Jayp) have your KTC coin? I never got around to buy it, I wanted to have more time under my belt before i purchased it. I think I will wait until I hit my first year, then I can proudly post a picture of me and my coin. You all stay cool.

DDD

Jeff j
Jeff j
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

Hey DDD

I never purchased a coin, for me, after my 100 days I remember I was back home in Denver, I went to my cabin and enjoyed the view of the Rocky Mountains without a dip. That was my goal and reward.

Good to see you stop in also, and congratulations on how far you are. I hope you can stop in more, I am here often. Now, and will help as much as I can.

Wow. I was reading some old posts when the band was together back in the day: jayp DDD. Shiva and myself.

Band of brothers. Now we have a rookie who we all should help and get him into the band

Shiva. You stud!

Ok. Sorry is sometimes my spelling sucks. I use my iPhone
Jeff
8-14-14

Anupam
Anupam
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeff j

Omg jeff ! You are here from 2014 ? Wow. I just noticed that.

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  Anupam

So was jayp. He was ahead of me: DDD was ahead of me. And so was shiva now that I think about it…

Almost 5 years and I am so glad I did it. Trust me. I was here each day back then: I had no idea how to join a group, so I hung out in this page

8-14-14

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeffj

Same with me. Anupam. I met Jeff, DDD, Shiva, there was also a Rick and Steve here too, but haven’t seen them here in a long time. We all helped each other. Take control of this board, reach out to other quitters. Me and Jeff and DDD and Shiva can attest, the board worked just like a group-think. We all had each other’s backs.
I’m thankful for these guys and this site…it got me free from nicotine.
It has been the best decision I’ve made in my life as well.
Stay quit!
-JP
7-15-14

Anupam
Anupam
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

lol DDD , really loved the way you said ? ‘welcome to the SUCK’ . From two days I am feeling constipation ? . Not sure it’s cause of this or may be I recently started low carb diet . It’s my 24th day today ☺️ I am seriously waiting to complete my full one month and to reward me something. ? jeff DDD jayP and shiva. You guys are seriously inspiration to me.

05/14/2019

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  DDD

DipiDyDont…yes, I did buy a coin. I haven’t did much with it though. No pictures or anything. I guess I more than less bought it to support this site. I really am thankful I found it and was able to contribute to it in someway.
I’d say I’d you’re approaching day 230-250, you “should” have a great handle in things. So long you always realize (like me), you’re an addict to nicotine. No more means no more, not even one.
I’m glad to see you here in the 200’s, this tells me you are done and moving on in life, I am happy for you.
Jeff was a help for me too, Shiva was a few months ahead of me back then, but he still popped in here and there.
Good to see you’re less than 2 days away from the first floor, see you there!
-JP
7-15-14

Jeffj
Jeffj
5 years ago
Reply to  JAYP

Dude. Can you believe it. We are almost 5 years?

Congrats jayp

Jeffj
8-14-14

JAYP
JAYP
5 years ago
Reply to  Jeffj

It’s really hard to believe it Jeff…5 years just flew by.
I was just some dude tired of dipping and ready to quit and luck had it…I found this place and met a lot of good people along the way.
I’m really happy to see DDD well on his way again to be free.
It takes a lot of guys to come clean like him and Shiva. But in all honesty I had to fail before too…to realize what it takes to quit.
I mentioned previously, I had quit before for a about 6 months. It took one single dip on a fishing trip and 17 years later, I was here, ready to quit again. I will not go through that hell again.
Great job to you too Jeff, you too DDD, you too Shiva. I will always be thankful to you guys.
And all you new quitters…if I can be clean for almost 5 years now, after dam near a 30 year habit…YOU CAN TOO!
Good hearing from you Jeff!
-JP
7-15-14

Anupam
Anupam
5 years ago

Wow ! You guys are superb . Yeah I should quit beer for sometime. May be that’s the reason for more cravings. But only beer or other alcoholic drinks too ?
I am from india though, right now on a vacation to USA and found this site.
I googled where can i find smokeless tobacco here and found harris teeter sells that ? but I didn’t go there
Instead whenever some grocery items are required I avoid going there , I go to target and aldi where they don’t sell that.

5/14/2019

Jeff j
Jeff j
5 years ago
Reply to  Anupam

Shiva is from India. Her hits 100 days in 2 days: he is also here in southern Cali for business. I live here.

As I said. One day at a time. Count your victories and keep pushing.

Jeff
8-14-14

1 31 32 33 34 35 43
Back to top button
4.8K
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x