What To Expect When You Quit Dipping
So you want to quit dipping and you would like to know what to expect when you do. We’re not going to pull any punches around here, it’s tough. That’s why we’re all here. This timeline has been put together over the years with the input of THOUSANDS of quitters. It has been shown to be remarkably accurate from the time you STOP USING NICOTINE.
Days 1 through 3 – Pure hell. You will walk in the fog. Nothing will seem real. Your brain is wondering where the hell its fix is and it is going to punish you until you come up with it. 72 hours, that’s all you need to get the nicotine out of your system. This is where you start to deal with the physical withdrawal associated with quitting dip. Drink lots of water. Read, post, read and post. Don’t take your anger out on your loved ones. We always tell everyone………Make this quit about YOU. If you quit for your wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, kids, mommy or daddy, you will resent them during this period. Quit for yourself and come in here to rant. Yell at us. Bitch at us. We can take it. We’ve been there.
Days 4 through 20 – Here comes the mind games. The nicotine is out of your system now. You will still have some physical things to deal with.
- Cravings
- Irritability
- Insomnia
- Fatigue
- Inability to Concentrate
- Headache
- Sore throat
- Constipation, gas, stomach pain
- Dry mouth
- Sore tongue and/or gums
Yep, you have this to look forward to. Your brain is rewiring itself. It isn’t used to being in an oxygen rich environment. Your body is responding in kind. Everything is a mind game now. All the cravings you have are actually due to triggers. Triggers are events where you are in a situation you would normally dip in. Mowing the grass, playing poker online, playing golf, working on the car………you get the picture. Keep drinking water, use seeds, the fake stuff, whatever you need to keep the dip out of your mouth. Remember, oral fixation is part of our habit, something you will eventually need to break. For now though, use all the tools you have.
Days 20 – 50 – You’re winning. Life isn’t great, but you probably had a couple of nights where you actually got some sleep. You might notice you’re going to bed earlier than you normally do. Not staying up to get in that last dip. You may notice some sores in your mouth. You’re thinking, “great, I quit dipping and now I have cancer.” You almost certainly don’t. Your mouth is healing itself. Tiny ulcers you’ve had for a long time are healing. We recommend you visit your dentist around the 30 day mark. Don’t be a pansy, just do it. He or she will be very supportive and they can explain the sores much better than we can. Don’t let your guard down. Don’t go out drinking with the fellas or the girls. We also recommend that you don’t drink for at least the first 50 days. Drinking is a huge trigger event and it weakens your resolve.
Days 50 – 70 – Cruise control. Life is really good. You still think about it, but this is good stuff here. Some people may suffer anxiety attacks during or a little before this stage. Some doctors say we dipped to relieve anxiety anyway. Some people can push right through this, others need a little help. Talk to your doctor before you quit or immediately after you quit. They will know what to do. Some give Wellbutrin or Lexapro. Lots of people in the support community take or have taken these medicines and can help you with the affects. Don’t wait till you get to this stage of the game to talk to a doctor. You’ll cruise through this stage much easier if you know how to take care of the anxiety or at least know it’s coming.
Days 70 – 90 – Late term craves, the doldrums, the blahs, the blues. Some people end up feeling like they are right back at day 1. The fog, the haze, the craves. It can be a tough time. You need to let people in your group know this is happening. Time to circle the wagons to get through it. It usually only lasts a few days. Fight through this and make sure your order your HOF Knife or Coin. Here are a couple of articles about this time period which we refer to as “The Funk”
Days 90 – HOF – Houston, resume the countdown. Enjoy the hell out of these last 10 days. You will be celebrating with your group as you all enter the HOF. It is a great feeling and an accomplishment you should not take lightly. Do something special for yourself and your family. They put up with your sorry ass for the last 90 days and they deserve something too.
100+ Days – Stay vigilant. Use the tools you have, to continue beating back any cravings or urges. You will still experience dip dreams and longings, but you are fully qualified to beat them down. Continue to post roll with your group. Get into the newer groups and help somebody out. Pass it along. Live the dream.
Im OK and still hanging in there . Just feeling kinda strange at this point. I consciously want to be done with tobacco permanently.forever. I know what it has done to my mind And personal life and has really affected my decision making.yet I find mysekf wistfully thinking of the “good old days” of chewing and its only been 24 days! Ive thought about going back everyday but have not yet so I’m hanging in there. Played my last game of ball for 5 months so that’s outta the way. That was a HUGE trigger, even with smokey mountain. I suppose the fake dip was just enough and I eben played ok after a couple games without the tobacco. Seeing people use tobacco really makes me itchy and there’s lots of guys on the ballfield with golf ball sized chews in. Aaahhh! That was me last month! Its looks like shit yet somehow somehow I’m envious. So…….hanging in there.
you guys ok? aint talking
When do we see your HOF speech?
Jeff day 87
thanks guys, ya’ll keep it up
Congrats deepy… way to go…
100 days
CONGRATS DUDE!
Wow!, this was a post from me 6 years ago (DeepyDeeDont). I guess I did make it to 100 days. I have been saying that I quit my quit at day 99, but i did make it past 100 days and then I went back to it. I remember those days. I was going through death in the family and a breakup with a beautiful almost bride of mine, at work, things were going badly and all of these external forces proved to be stronger than my will to quit nicotine.
Now I know nothing is an excuse to start dipping again.
I remember that day when I started dipping again. There was a partially used Skoal can on a kitchen rack, I had seen it a couple of days before, I should have thrown it away, but I left it there. I came back from work on a really pissy mood and said the hell with it, I’ll just take one to take the edge off, no one would know.
How wrong I was, I remember taking it in and spitting it out after a minute or 2, I still thought, no one will know, but I knew.
I kept thinking well, I’ve already broke my 100 day mark, I’ll have to start over, let me just try another bite. So that evening I did take another cud and this time I kept in it like before.
Then I said well, let me just finish this used can and then I’ll quit.
I finished it and went and bought another one.
That was the beginning of another 4 years of spitting.
Forwarding to Oct/22/2018, I came back to this site and started my new journey, this time I’ve managed to stay away from it for over 2 years now. 810 days to be exact.
A lot has happened since then, including more death in the family and breakups with girlfriends, but my quit has remained steady. I think the last time I quit, I was ready to do it permanently.
You all stay safe.
DDD
10-22-2018
810 Days Proudly Quit.
Congrats to Deepy, please let us all know you made it….by my count, today is day 100! Looking forward to that HOF speech!!
-JP
Deepy
Congrats my brother! I am so happy and proud of you!
Thanks for all the motivation, for your daily posts that are a complete diary of your journey.
Jeff
Day 85
Great Job Rick! 3 weeks is HUGE! after another, it will be a whole month, time will fly from there. Hope the fog is letting up some, I know it was 30-40 days for me, but things will continue to get easier, congrats!!
-JP
3 wks yesterday. Thanks for everybody’s support and posts and congrats on kicking tobacco. Everyday is a new challenge!
Deeply almost to 100!
Rick
Congrats Rick… now slowly churn out the next 3 weeks… š
20 days dude, you are almost a pro, wait ill you can say. I’ve been quit for 30 days or a month whichever you like, wouldn’t that be bad ass? yes it would. Now do it.
I hear your footsteps Hombre, you’re about to walk through this 1st floor door, hope you have a great Day 99, less than 24hrs until you hit the 100 mark, proud of ya buddy!
-JP
Day 20 today. Hard to stay focused on menial tasks but… Tomorrow will be 3 weeks! Still seem to be finding new triggers all the time , ones I didn’t even know I had. There’s a store right up the street that sells my favorite kind and I’ve been thinking about going up there a lot but I KNOW what that will mean. Another couple years of chewing so while I want one More I don’t 1000 more. Hanging tough today dudes grinding it out.
Just completed 101st day. Proud of it! Thanks for the information and posts.
NA
Day 102
YES! Congrats Tony!
Rick
I agree, the fog does suck, but it’s part of the path that you are on. I chewed allot or Copenhagen before my quit, so my fog was around 40 days. I am not trying to freak you out, but it’s the truth for me.
Your half way to my fog lifting day.. Be strong.
I remember mine was so bad, I was driving to San Diego to see a customer, half way there, I had no clue why I was going there…
It’s hard brother. Just keep on the new path
Jeff
Day81
Looks like you’re ion cruise control as well Jeff, keep it up, you’re just a few mere steps behind DDD. We’ll be waiting for your arrival as well, have a great day!
-JP
Your definitely rewiring your subconscious! Its like you walked the same path through the woods for 20+ years that path is so worn down and now all have of a sudden you made a new path and have to kick through the weeds and cut down trees etc… Its easy to keep walking the same path that’s worn down… Let’s make new trails! Feeling foggy today boys! This shit won’t give up
Day 19
Thanks Jeff. I am glad you think I am cool.
Dude, JayP you got some extra experience in quitting, and Rick, it has to be challenging carrying all that with you, but you can do it you’re bigger than that. Shiva, thanks for commenting here again.
All right guys, I am back and feeling much better. I had a huge crave this morning and screwed up part of my day, but then it got better.
Here’s how weird the cravings are getting:
They are triggered and the feeling of taking that dip goes through the brain.
At this point that the muscles in the body would respond to this order by the brain in the past, now it stops there and seems like another part of the brain kicks in and starts rationalizing against it. So you see what used to be a mechanical automated response to reach for the can and start packing it, now the brain starts saying or thinking, why? so you can start all over? so you can start the sick feeling you experienced while you were doing it? The nasty brown spots on your shirts? the spit on the side of the jeep and seats? The hiding from people?
Now, at least part of my brain is fighting that other part that craves it, where as before, it was just automatic, remember? you’d be working on something or mowing the lawn or get on the road to go somewhere? what was the first thing you did?, without even thinking it, you just reached for it, pop it in and away you went didnt you?
So that’s pretty cool huh?, at least for me, that is how my quit is going.
And for even more good news, I only have 5 days to go dudes, 95 days down.
Time to start thinking about my HOF speech. So there you go, another positive thing to look forward to.
Stay Positive Boys, we are all in this together.
DDD
Time to round up the boys!!! I was just on the home page “quit dipping today”
Deepy, jayp,shiva,rick. There are a few newbies that need our support,,,, if you have some time. Check it out..,
Jeff
Day 81
Thanks boys !!
We are all addicts.!!!
Deepy, even your rants are cool, a fucking yoga gym… Loved it! But, I am glad you told us, we are all with you and we all want you to hit 100. I have no doubts you will hit 100, as I will, craves suck!
Anyways, you guys hang in there…
Marijuana? Isn’t that stuff basically legal these days?? Hahaha! Seriously though, that stuff from my understanding is all about being a psychological addiction, people are just a bit crabby when stopping it. I wouldn’t even compare a pot “habit” in the same stadium as a nicotine addiction. I am not ashamed to say I’ve dabbled with it myself.
I’m going to again share some stuff here, I brushed on earlier. A couple years ago, I came down with some anxiety. In the 38 years I was on this earth, stress was something I could shoulder very well. But there were some things that happened that got me worried. Well, the worrying snowballed into full blown anxiety. I had test after test done, because I did not know “what” this shit was. I thought I had a brain tumor, Thyroid issues, Kidney problems, Liver Problems, Heart issues…so many things were being tested, only to come up empty. Finally I went and “talked” to someone, directed by the doctor of course, and after speaking to this “counselor, he indeed thought I had a lot on my plate and said it was anxiety. Great! Now I am a whack-a-doodle?! Hahahaha! I was prescribed a very small dose of Zoloft and I was VERY hesitant on taking the “brain” meds. But I was in a bad spot and started taking (a half dose of what they give a 5 year old) the stuff 2 weeks later. And to be honest, it helped me get back to being grounded, feeling “normal” (whatever the hell normal is). I dropped some weight, started eating healthier, and got back into excising, since all my research said all these things would help me. Well, they did! 9 months later, I told the “counselor” and my doc, I am going to get off this shit. I’m tired of being a slave to the meds. I read the longer you’re on the shit, the harder it is to discontinue. Well, the doc nor this counselor agreed, they said the meds made me feel better (everyone has an agenda) and also said if I got of them, there are no side effects, I call BULLSHIT! Vertigo is a dam side effect! But this lasted for a few weeks and I was off the stuff. I continued my own “medication” Running, lifting and eating healthy and I was about 95% free from the anxiety. Fast Forward to my 40th Bday party in July. I always said I would quit chewing at 40, here it was! I quit the day after my Bday. Around day 5-6 here comes Anxiety again. I didn’t really put 2 and 2 together with the nicotine stop….but it was all to do with it. Had I not experienced the Anxiety before, I wouldn’t of known what that was. But it too, along with the fog finally went away (days 40-60). This year has been “The year of quitting things”. Been tough, no doubt. But back to the marijuana, my golf partner likes to partake, anyway, I tried the stuff back in the early summer. I read lots of people use this for anxiety. Well, obviously not my kind of anxiety!! I felt paranoid as hell! It was really my final time with that stuff, I don’t like to do anything that makes me feel anxiety. But to each their own. I agree, tackle one thing at a time Rick! And about the Zoloft….if I ever need to take it again, I would, just not as long as I did. I can only imagine what side effects are for people that are on high doses and for a long time!
Sorry about dropping my Biography out here, but when you read what people are up against and have a similar story, I feel it helps.
-JP
Dude I love your stories! Yea anything in moderation is ok . I probably wouldn’t have quit tobacco if I could’ve controlled it but the problem is I just can’t. Two cans a day is def not control and the same thing for the other thing. If I have it I’m doing it all the time and skipping family time friends time. When I was 17 it was like a little seed that now at 31 grew to an enormous tree that I can’t even put my arms around. And for along time tobacco and pot were synonymous for me. If I did one had to do the other yknow? Like drinking and smoking for some people. Its an addiction for me and I’ll probably need some help to put it down. The last time I quit which was 2 years ago I started drinking everyday and I don’t even really like alcohol all that much,but had to fill the void.hell I went to the bar once in the last 3 weeks and had 1 beer. It might sound like I’m a mess but really its just the pot and tobacco and I’m 18 days free of the tobacco! Thanks for the support dudes I’m on this website and especially this page all day reading posts and it is very helpful to me. Free therapy!
I am just getting a bit curious on your “other” addiction Rick š
Cricket ah? Hit any “Sixer’s lately? Hehe then you know what I’m going through. Since you asked I will tell you. Its marijuana and before you laugh will tell that if I go 24 hours without I turn into a pumpkin. No its not chemically addicting but for me very psychologically addicting. I used to spend 100$ a week before I got married now its like 40$ a week just to stay happy. I was on Zoloft and adderrall all through childhood and when I turned 18 I stopped taking them and started self medicating. About 7 years later added tobacco. Everything except for work and ball get put on hold for it. My wife has completely given up on trying to get me to stop. I know its wrong but knowing is only half the battle. Hope you guys don’t think less of me. Trust me it stopped being fun a long time ago.
I guess I should add that my other addiction seems to “hide” the fog a little but I wouldn’t recommend it to anybody. Its something I’ve struggled with since I was 17. When I get over tobacco I will tackle that one next. Maybe if I hang around here long enough I’ll tell ya guys about it someday. I have A very addictive personality, if my brain likes something then it wants it and thinks about it all the time.
Let’s talk about all the wonderful things in Life shall we? Has anyone seen my unicorn?
What the fuck? i am in a really pissy mood today because I woke up with a gigantic crave to chew that fucking tobacco, there I said it. I am still hooked on that shit and it pisses me off like I said, it helps to throw out all that bad energy in here so I can move on, Don’t like my rants, Don’t read them. Want to hear some positive thoughts go join a fucking Yoga Gym.
Sorry guys, it is not a good day today.
You’re an addict, like the rest of us Deepy, what to expect? I guess maybe I have them too, but just don’t have any interest in that shit anymore. I don’t know. The hell I dealt with mostly was the 30-40 day stretch, after that, I was too busy trying all these fake dips out here to even think about that green can of Skoal I used to carry. I guess this goes to show, each of us have a different level of crave for that stuff. Be strong my may Brother, you are just 5 days away from 100, well qualified to beat the shit out of the habit now!
Hope your day gets better!!
-JP
Right there with ya dude. I completely understand. Kick that poisons ass!
I got you… I know.. sometimes.. somedays.. it’s fuck everyone..get lost… but there is always light at the end of tunnel which is to stay as you are warding off the evil š
Semper fi
USMC ’82-88
Day 18 here reading DKs post made me think I’m being a little too negative at times. That probably stems from the fact that I failed at quitting many times in the past and that if I slip one it could be another 5 years before I try again. I think everybody uses or used tobacco for different reasons and quitting will have different effect for each person. Every time I put that junk in my face my self respect went down a notch because I knew it was wrong and kept doing it anyway. Good thing is. Every time I say no it goes back up!
Clngrats on day 80 Jeff!
Deepy- almost there!
Almost to 3 weeks Rick, great job! How you feeling? Any Brain Fog? I had that shit for a while and is what bugged me the most. And I did have some anxiety as well, had I not experienced it prior to the quit, I wouldn’t had known what anxiety was. But I got through it and here I am today, still dip/fog and mostly anxiety free.
I don’t think any of the stuff posted out here is negative, we’re all addicts trying to get over using this shit as a crutch in life. It’s tough for sure. But you keep the shit pout of the face and watch your self respect continue to climb, congrats on Day 18, 3 more to the 3 week mark, you’re cruising!
-JP
Well yes lots of fog for sure! But I was up near 2 cans a day when quit so not surprised at all. I was saturated with tobacco and nicotine! Lots of anxiety and the antidote is at the store, just kidding I know better now. I said earlier that softball will be over very soon like next week now and I’ll tell ya trying to hit that moving round ball with a round bat has gotten difficult since I quit! So hopefully when softball starts back up In april I will have gotten used to being tobacco free
You will definitely get past all this stuff Rick. I actually didn’t think I would get past it since it lasted for so dam long, believe me! I was at a point where I actually began thinking “so THIS is what life without tobacco feels like” and thought about caving. But I didn’t and kept the course and the shit did lift. You’re will too in time, trust it from someone who went through the same dam thing. Remember….if it were easy, everyone would do it….what you said around day 9-10? It isn’t easy, but gets easier…promise!
-JP
Fog and fatigue was shit for me for first 3 weeks.. I used to come back from work and just lie in couch for God know hours…
But 50-65 was the most difficult for me…
Anyway, Rick I play Cricket (something similar to baseball but mostly English :))… and after quit at least for a month or so my performance went down very badly.. But hold on, after couple of months you’ll see your performance will go much better and it can get better than when you used to dip
anyway if it helps u.. the fog will start to lift from like 3-4 hours to may be 10-15 mins by around 2 weeks and most cases u’ll be completely free by 3rd week.
And sometimes around that time, your innerself will realise you are on the right path and will start free from the slavery š
Hell yeah Jeff, 80 freaking days, here is the compliment to that, do you realize that in 20 measly days you gonna be making your HOF speech? I was so much more concentrated on getting there that it kinda got me by surprise, I only got 6 days. Ain’t it freaking cool?
I mean I had to propose and defend my thesis in school to get my degree and that was nerve wrecking and a challenge, but staying off nicotine, dudes, that takes the cake, unbelievable is it not? Well at least that means a lot to me, to some people defending thesis, produce dissertations, jumping out of airplanes or quitting smoking or dipping may not be a big deal, but to me, it is, and I am damned proud I am doing it, I know you guys are proud too.
Holy shit. I am day 80… Sorry for tooting my own horn! But. This is awesome
Day 81 today for you Jeff, 19 more to the first floor, no need to apologize for “tooting your own horn my man, this IS “awesome” shit! Hope you feel like you are on cruise control like I did in this stretch. I’m sure you may get the occasional crave, as I did too, but use your tool box and march on with it. We’ll be back again soon, until then, keep up the fight!
-JP
Right on DK. Kick ass on your quit… There are many kick ass quitters here to cheer you on!!!
DK, I applaud your quit and your strong will to consider this cessation an easy task.
Perhaps you are one of the lucky ones that can control the urges of this tobacco both, physically and mentally with such ease. May I ask if this is your first time quitting the dip? and What made you quit?
Hey guys, thanks for the posts and the site itself. I dipped a can a day for near 10 years and I decided to quit cold turkey recently. I just passed the 72 hour mark, and so far it wasn’t as bad as I thought.
I understand the desire to prepare people for the truth that this might be an extremely physically and psychologically testing event in their life.
However, I found the strongest motivation to be the fact that it is nothing I can’t handle. Let’s stop feeling like victims and sorry for ourselves. It’s tobacco, it’s a plant, we can all stop if motivated. Just one man’s opinion.
Welcome to the board DK, glad you got through the 72 hours….tell us how you’re doing now. And its not the plant that one is addicted to, its the dam stuff in it….the nicotine that causes the pain and grief. I wish I had quit at the 10 year mark….which I did the first time and it was a little easier back then, I guess. But I went back and ended up with 15 more years on that shit and it wasn’t easy when I quit this time. Let that sink in deep my brother! It sure the hell isn’t easier the second time. And I don’t feel sorry for myself or want others pity, but the support you get from the quitters on this board is something amazing and motivating. Hope to hear more from you and good luck!
Kick ass DK :)…. Boom -ba-ya š
That was one hell of a HOF dude, thanks for mentioning us, it actually feels good to be mentioned as a positive influence in anyone’s accomplishment.
I just got off from work, I had to fill in for some dummy that decided to go on vacation, guess this is what you call a double shift? I was in at 7:30 got out at 11:00 PM, sucked big time, but hey what’s a man got to do?.
Here is the interesting point though, I remember being in charge of that late shift and of course after finishing up and going home, I would put a big fatty on my way home.
Well, needless to say I had forgotten about it (The big ass after work crave), since I ain’t done that shift in a long time, but guess what? the Nic Bitch don’t forget, so I got the mother of all craves just a little while ago, and fellows, it made my knees buckle and forced me to remember that I have 3/4 of that can under my seat, all in a matter of seconds.
It was tough to convince myself not to do it. it almost convinced me actually fellows, I was actually taking a shine to actually just do one, I started thinking “let me see if what the guys say its true” ,
if I take one it will tun to 10,000 (Rick) rushed through my head.
Who is going to know? it is dark here, i worked my butt off, I deserve this. then I thought, what about the guys? I could lie to them, but I can not lie to myself, there are people relying on me just like I am relying on them.
That seemed to halt all my crazy thoughts for a while, stopped for gas and brewsky at the gas station and you know what is in there, but I actually did not think about it anymore, unreal, but somehow the power that a group of people going through this challenge and stay in touch generates seems to be more powerful than the greatest addiction in the world.
Rick you experienced that remember? JayP, Jeff? I know you guys have felt that surge of power, its weird to describe.
In my job, sometimes I have to make speeches in front of people, I tell them, I can feel the energy of the room, it is true, I tell them, it’s like the concert rock stars says, you can feel their energy and you reflect it back. Well it’s like that.
Maybe I am romanticizing too much, but how else can you describe something you can’t measure, see or weigh?
Anyway that rush of energy I received allowed me to continue quit, thanks guys.
DDD
Way to go man. A group of people I s stronger than one person for sure.we need to be strong because nicotine takes a long time to give up. I hear ya with the crave man I used to chew all day at work so quitting has made my job very mentally taxing, I used to do everything with a chew in. I feel like a fish out of water now. But I know it will get better just gotta keep grinding! Chewing some smokey mountain as I type this. Been doing about a can a day since I quit.
Jayp awesome speech dude your a helluva guy for sticking around and helping out.
Jeff thanks for your kind helpful words they help ALOT.
You guys have provided me with a lot of tools to combat tobacco and I will continue to do so.
I have sold my soul to tobacco for too long and I’m fighting to get it back.
99% of people that use tobacco started before they were 18. I guess if you make too adulthood without tobacco you can make an adult decision not to use it. It sucjs you guys started so young because you weren’t fully educated on the dangers. I was one of the dumbasses that started after 18, again I’m really pissef at myself for starting such a terrible habit. I’m not particularly religious but I really think that tobacco was created by the devil. What else could torment you so much yet be so bad for you? I used to drink soda daily til about 3 yes ago now i only have one when we go out to eat. I never think about it any other time. No cravings for soda at all. There’s one big difference between the 2. NICOTINE!
Day 17
Rick
You guys have helped me just as much as I’ve tried to help you and you both (and now Rick) needed to be mentioned. I’ve spent over 100 days on this page and you guys have been on and off here with me…and I appreciate it. There is definitely a Power to a group of people going through the same shit….I hear you there.
As Rick says below, a group is stronger than an individual….and we got a nice group of STRONG quitters right here. My hopes is what Shiva mentioned, we get others here and help them through this. I see one guy came, was strong for a day, then hasn’t been back. And I don’t judge, this isn’t easy to do….the struggles that one goes through to dump this habit is well documented right here on this page.
Thanks for the kind words Rick, Me, DDD and Jeff will be expecting your HOF speech too. It will be here before you know it, 100 days FLYS by.
As stupid as it sounds, I really never regretted chewing. I didn’t really start (seriously), until I was 15, this was when I was on the Varsity Wrestling team in HS, and EVERYONE did it. And It just became a High School addiction that turned into an adult habit. I knew I would quit someday, just didn’t think it would take as long as it did. But as I mentioned, these fake chew alternatives today, are great. Never again, will I have to go back to the tobacco, if I am in the mood for a chew. They fill the void just fine for me. I don’t even give those “shiny cans behind the counter”, (Deepy) a second look these days, they are not appealing to me any longer. I hope this all comes to you guys as well. And I still have that can of Skoal Wintergreen Long Cut sitting up in my cabinet, next to my Triumph, Holt, Smokey Mountain and Jakes Mint Chew….that thing honestly does not tempt me any. I love the empowerment I have these days!
JP
Day 106
And thanks to all of you here on this very page…you guys have been a big help and I will be here for all of you and new comers!
Thanks guys, it means a lot.
Any time Deepy :).. Of late, I have been thinking that I should make it a goal to help as many brothers (& sisters) as possible to help them get out of this damn addiction, the lies this bitch been feeding us and the wonderful life we all had before we fell. If there is something I should feel accomplished, I want to think about all the poor souls I helped saving or to put it more appropriately a part I played in their lives so that they quit….
It makes me immensely sad about all those people in not very developed part of the world who cannot access these wonderful resources to know the truth.
Shiva you are right on with that last statement. Statistics show that households in the poorest countries spend 10% of their annual income on tobacco. Because of increased restrictions here the tobacco companies started targeting poor countries where there isn’t any inf o out on the dangers of tobacco. It is really sad.
There he is, good to hear from you Shiva. Good of you to chime in Bro.
Rick, one more chew could mean 10,000 more, ain’t that the truth? No happy medium.
Well, JayP, I’ve been looking for your HOF speech and haven’t been able to find it,
What did you title it?
Its getting close to mine too, As soon as I post it. I’ll let you guys know. 93 days, 7 more to go.
Hot Dam!!!! come on guys You’ll be there next.
Just published JAYP’s HOF speech here: https://www.killthecan.org/jayps-hof-speech-10232014/
Thanks for linking this Chewie and a big thanks to you again!!
Deepy. I am excited for your HOF,
that always haunts me.. the first cigarette when I was 23 :(..
Also was wondering jayp do you or did you ever think about that first chew you took in the river when you were quit for 6 months? I find myself thinking about that first dip I took, how easy it was, it was definitely a choice,my choice to take that first chew. Man I wish I could go back and kick 25yr old ricks ass for making that choice. I’m really pissed at tobacco today.
I remember my first dip like it was yesterday – Skoal Wintergreen Banit at my first high school football game when I was 14. (Ironically, given to me by a KTC member!) Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid.
Stupid.
My first dip: summer 1979 Littleton Colorado. Happy days chew( look it up. Walt garrison was the spokesman for skoal. Copenhagen and Happy Days chew)
I quit in 2004for 2 years, stupid me, I will just have just have ” one” We’ll that didn’t turn out well, I was hooked again ,until August 11 2014
I know already I cannot just have one small dip, I learned that lesson, so if you think you can have one dip… Trust me,,, you can’t have just one
Hey Rick, yes, I remember that day. I used to go up north in Michigan, this time of the year when the salmon are running up the river to spawn. Well, here I was, 6 months quit, and probably 3 of the 6 guys we were with start pulling out cans, thumping the the lids (packing the can) then popping in the shit. I guess I just felt like I was strong enough to take one or be a “weekend warrior dipper”…but that isn’t true. Like you, I’m a nicotine addict, I can’t do that shit, quit means quit. I took the dip, then another and another….I got home and couldn’t resist not having one and BOOM! The habit had began again. I’m sorta glad it happened…because now I know, I cannot ever take 1 again if I want to remain a quitter.
Hey jayp I know what your saying man. Back in the summer all I could think about was quitting even though I was still chewing constantly.now that I’ve been away for a couple of weeks all I can think about was how nice it was to have a chew. You know the 2 guys that “helped” me start my habit have since quit. The one dude was in my wedding, a really good friend of mine. When I found out that he quit I was kinds mad about it like ” thanks a lot help me get started with tobacco and then give it up a year or 2 later!”.of course now I’m happy about it being that for the last 2 weeks I’m right with him. I really REALLY wish he would have warned me about all the crap that comes with putting dip in your face. Maybe he wanted me to experience the misery as well I don’t know.
Deepy yes being humble is definitely necessary but sometimes tough to do. For me trying to quit this junk for the last 2 years has made me very humble, its literally the hardest thing I have ever done. Yeah I haven’t done it for 16 days now but llok how quickly it could have went hell? Over the weekend I was sitting in front of the store with my favorite kind of Skoal just staring at the open can. Wondering, contemplating, just sitting g there trying to decide if I want to continue to chew another 5 or 10 years. Its never just one can and it never will be. So here’s my motto that I came up with.
“One more chew could mean 10000 more chews”
Does anybody find it ironic that users want to quit and quitters still fantasize about using? That tells me that this stuff is dangerous. There is no happy medium your either doing or not. Today I am not
Day 16
Rick
Hell yeah Boys!!, only 8 days away for the big 100. Feels awesome, keep it up guys.
Here is something that I noticed from a couple of guys in here that I followed during their quit. Seems like When we are doing the shit and nothing is wrong, good health, not too much flack from people about your disgusting habit, good job, good marriage, well, why quit huh? it’s all good after all, they even consider people in here losers or whatever derogatory terms just because they are willing to defend their cause and face it guys, we were all there.
At some point in our lives something clicks, breaks, snaps, or occurs in our lives that makes you realize you’ve hit rock bottom, you know you are there and you realize you have to get out, some people rage and act superior and never get out, until they humble themselves. Once you come to peace that you are wrong and others are right, that you cannot lie to yourself no more, you truly become humble and start your climb up out of that hole.
I noticed you guys been reading back on posts, its all there, it’s in mine too, some of us come in here all cocky and become humble along the way and some others come here already humble and ready to start.
I am thinking now that keeping that humble feeling about this quit is important even after we complete 100 and many other 100 days, because after all it was that feeling that probably saved our lives or at least saved the integrity of our faces.
Hey I noticed looking back through the posts that I have mostly talking about myself,bitching and ranting about my situation. You guys all should be (I know you are) very very proud of the fact that you made it this far and are determined tovkeep going. Its awesome and inspiring and gives a guy like me hope that there’s light at the end of the tunnel. You all have chewed at least 4 times as long as I have and kicked that leeching shit out of your lives. Its fucking great! I guess there will be a life after tobacco for me. I can’t wait. I can’t believe I let this habit go as long as it did………
Jayp
Awesome post!
Rick. You are kicking ass! Over two weeks into your quit and you are still marching forward.
I remember being at two weeks, and actually surprised myself for quitting for two weeks. I just could not believe that I could actually quit. Now on day 78 my thoughts look to day 100, and beyond!!
Thanks jayp for your post regarding how friends sometimes don’t help on the quit. I think your right, I would almost bet, they wish they could quit.
Deepy !! Right on dude, your close to 100.
I remember the first post you did, it was short and sweet, something like. “Day 15 27 yrs” or something like that… I read yours and jayp for several weeks before I ever posted.. Thanks dude
I also wanted to say yeah I must have been pretty addicted although I can’t compare to anybody else Cuz I live in my own head haha. I never EVER told myself no when it came tobacco. If I had the slightest desire to chew and knew I could get away with it I would do so. I often chain chewed all day only taking it out to eat just so I could have another one. I was also a complete ninja Dipper
Except on the ballfield and at work. It got to be a challenge for me to see whether I could get away with it and I did many times. I was like a little kid who would continually eat cookies out of the jar when he was told not to. It was a rush. I was like haha got away with it again. I know now that I killed myself a little each time I fired a chew in. My habits had not gone unnoticed though. I come from a very close family and was at birthday party last week and my 12yr old nephew comes up and says “hey rick what are you still doing here?” You see I would leave about 2 or 3 hours before everyone else would leave so I could have my various fixes otherwise I would turn into a pumpkin. I thought nobody noticed.or cared. But my nephew definitely did. I had been leaving early for so long that it was a shock that I stuck around yes addiction affects other people too , even if they don’t know your addicted. Well I am an addict a fiend and I’ve lied and deceived many people to keep it going. My own mother still doesn’t know. I don’t want her ever know. That’s why I’m here typing this post instead of chewing today. My thoughts and emotions are all over today but I’m happy I made it this far and just wanted to say thanks guys your all a big help.
Rick
Great Job Rick, over 2 weeks in and you’re cruising, that’s awesome!! I wanted to chime in on that “dead skin in your cheek” think, man I am glad I don’t have that anymore too. My Cheeks looked terrible. My dentist used to tell me to switch sides with it, which I did, but man, I chewed so dam much, it didn’t matter. I was definitely part of that “Ninja Dipper” brigade as well. The minute I spit one out, in went another! What a terrible habit! Happy to see you’re not caving and using this site to vent, post and using your fake chews as needed. All these things will get you thru this time. And believe, it WILL get easier, but might get a little harder on you first. Which, based on what you’ve posted here, I see you are dealing with the same shit I and the others have. Keep it up!!
I certainly agree with where your thoughts are too Deepy. That is one of the main reason I was always here posting, if not everyday, every other. It helps everyone to hear from one another. In a sense, its roll call away from roll call, ya dig? I’ve certainly enjoyed hearing from you and Jeff and now, newbie Rick (though, he’s about to lose this “newbie” tag), always nice to hear how you’re all coming along. Speaking of coming along, you’re in single digits to day 100 Deepy, I’m waiting for you!!
Way to go Jeff, keep on keeping on, you’re right behind Deepy! I hear ya about people not supporting your quit. Most people are SHOCKED when I tell them I am over a 100 days away from that stuff. They usually reply “You’ve still quit?”….um, yeah! I will say, dippers are proud of the quitters and the quitters still sort of envy and want that wad in their face, at least its the way I see it. I remember when I was still dipping, I actually envied a buddy of mine, who quit over 12 years ago. I just could never figure out how all these guys who dipped with me back in HS and College were able to quit. They just said they were done. Not one of them said it was easy or that they forgot about it…in fact, they still wanted a “plug”.
So, don’t expect them to fully support you, we all will (as you know), sounds like you have a circle that is pretty supportive, that’s awesome! But secretly, I KNOW these dippers ENVY what you’re doing, I know because I too envied the quitters!
Be good fellas and keep kicking that cans ass!
-JP
Day 105
Jayp
Just read your HOF! Awesome brother, you have been great at helping me, you keep up paying forward, as I plan to do the same!
Completely agree I gave quitting a shot after months of wandering this website and reading your guys posts. I was ready for a change. I still am. Can’t do this stuff forever so might as well kill it now!
Day 15
Rick
Well hells bells,Shit!! Rick, you are one tough hombre, I keep saying it, because I know what it takes to be where you are now, 2 Freaking weeks completed, awesome!!!. Not only that , but by you saying that you had your meals just so you could have the dip, that tells me you were even more hooked up than I was. I mean I had a bad addiction, but not to the point that it took a back seat to physiological routine. Unbelievable.
Titanic dude, that is the word to describe the will power you displayed this weekend. To tell you the truth, after reading this for a couple of days and didn’t read your posting I thought for sure you had caved in, but now I know you got them balls of steel. Welcome to the club.
And Yeah, that’s why I keep chiming that it is really important to keep posting, because that challenge us all to do it too, you know what I mean? If they can do it, I can do it too, you think. Or it would be pretty shitty of me to let these dudes down because they are counting on me too, others think.
That’s why they have this roll call thing where they go and say I won’t do it today and the whole group is all in tune.
I think that is great because it works for them, but I also think that posting an everyday, step by step, narration of the life of a quitter on his or her way to nicotine freedom can be very helpful to someone that is contemplating quitting.
What do you guys think?
Dam proud of you Rick. You got tempted big time.
If you read my previous posts you’ll see that I was almost there too, I didn’t actually buy the can, but I had my keys ready to go to the store, another time, I had the tobacco under the seat of my jeep, Remember? come on, you the one that told me that when I finally throw it away, it would be mostly ceremonial?
Yes, it is still there and I know it is there, but weird enough, I don’t think about it, unless it slides off to the side and I tuck it back away from view.
If your main trigger is playing ball and you only got a few days to go, then consider yourself lucky, that will be out the way and ride it out without that extra trigger.
For me it was the after meal crave, so as you see, I couldn’t just complete the season of eating. I had to continually deal with that crave.
Anyway, what I am trying to tell you is that yes, this project has absorbed most of your time and energy, I remember cursing it too, but it does get better. In a few days you’ll start feeling it, thinking it, making peace with the fact you are tobacco free.
Right now your mind is playing tricks on you. You are trying to rebel against anything that stands on your way of that crud, that’s why they say when you quit for real you have to make it about yourself and no one else otherwise you’ll be resenting them. It’s all you my man, only you can walk that walk, no one can do it for you.
Think about how much better it will be when the baby comes and you are nicotine free, not only that, but I can bet you a million bucks that your wife will look up to you for standing like a man against your biggest foe, not everyone can do this, just wait dude, you’ll see I tell you because it is happening to me, people see you different.
Hang in there, come in here and curse the hell out of everything, tell it like it is, rant away, believe it or not, it helps us too in our journey.
You know guys silly as it sounds part of the reason I didn’t actually put the chew in yesterday was becuz I didn’t wanna let ya guys down. I also know it was a huge victory because I actually tobacco in mi possession and still didn’t do it. I will say when I opened the can every nicotine receptor in my BODY cried out and stood on end. They knew how close they got to getting their fuel. Like a vampire. Ya know deely the meal thing was and is a huge thing for me I’ve been dealing with by chewing fake stuff. Without romanticizing my old habit I would say have the reason I ate was just to put another chew in. Another phrase I used to say a lot Qwhens the best time to put a chew in? A as soon you take one out. Terrible what I put my gums and teeth through. Small positive note I’m not scraping dead skin out of my cheeks anymore though. That’s definitely a good thing!
Thanks guys
Rick
Guys its been a rough weekend terms of tobacco with me. Played ball with an old buddy if mine had not told him about my quit and before I knew it he pulls his can out and throws one in, Asks me if I want one I said naw man I’m trying to get away from that stuff.he said good luck dude I quit every off season and start again every time I hit the diamond. You know that was Saturday morning and I thought about me and him and chewing all weekend Cuz I played about 6 games with the guy chewing at The dugout at the plate in the outfield. It really got to me. As a result played like shit all day thinking about that wirthless shit! I’m so angry at myself for starting this bullshit pointless habit! Soft ball will be over in 5 days then I won’t play for 6 months I’m really hoping I won’t be tempted as much I’m finding out that playing ball is an enormous trigger for me. I’m going to have to really work to get over that. I’m sorry to said boughtva can at the store yesterday cracked it open and before I did that familiar move of stuffing Skoal in my face I sat there for awhile and thought about what this would really mean to buy not just one can but maybev1000 more cans. I threw it out the window and went home. I suppose I wasted 2.89 but possibly saved my life? I don’t know its getting rough around here. I wanna be done with this crap but tired of feeling like shit and constantly focusing on quitting instead of focusing on positive things like a baby due in April.anyway 14 days guys rough days
Rick
Rick
Just keep thinking about your soon to be baby. I know all the triggers and they are strong, at your stage we all know how hard it is, but to get to day 100 you must keep fighting the nic bitch. I remember about a month ago Deepy posted a small post on how tired he was of quitting .. We all went through it,so can you. Imagine the day your baby is born and your way past 100 days of quit.
On a side note, my friends ignored my quit at first, when I quit. They would put a fatty in and ask if I was sure I wanted to quit… That’s bullshit, if don’t want to quit or don’t have the stones to quit, at least respect my decision. A true friend would help me by not tempting me. I am an addict. Yes I would want a dip! But I want to live without the bullshit of Copenhagen !
I do have my brother who is on day 12 now, and my friend who I hope quits soon, both support me.
So, rick. Fill your lip with smokey mountain and playball, don’t cave brother!!!
Jeff
Day 78
A professional sunflower seed spitter, nice! they need to include it in the Olympics. And Jeff, new title, new life.
The one i haven’t heard of is Rick, I hope he posts soon so we’ll know he is still with us.
Today is day 90 in my quit.
It had to be on a Saturday and I had to be down with allergies or cold, who knows, but it ain’t the mood for celebrating.
Yesterday though, there was a small gathering at the parents, I announced my quit and how long I had been doing it and they were pretty proud of me. I had mentioned it before, but I guess when its only a few days no one thinks much of it, for me it was a long time though.
The cravings and all that garbage are still there, but they are getting fewer and longer apart.
I think what has helped me a little is the fake dip that I ordered, it don’t do the damage like the real stuff and it helps with the craving of having that cud in your lip.
To be honest, sometime around the funk time, I thought about throwing it all to hell and start dipping, I had made up my mind and posted it too, maybe it was a cry for help, but I was mostly upset with the whole thing and with myself.
Maybe because when I started the quit, i read about how the craves and the fight never ends, even from people that had been quit for years, so I thought, if the inevitable cannot be stopped then do it until I cant do it no more and then start again, after all I would be stronger and healed by then. Those were the thoughts that haunted me every night.
Somewhere between the last 15 days or so, the thoughts have become more geared towards a permanent quit, it seems feasible now more than ever. The speeches and comments I read that made me think like that, seem to fade away and now it is more about a battle that I can win, no matter what others say, no matter if the craves persist.
I remember that night clearly, I posted my last post saying the hell with it all, picked up my keys and got ready to go to the store, pay attention newbies, this can happen to any of us at any time, So I am on my way out, for some reason I really don’t know why, but I decided to check one more time in here, and lo and behold a new guy had replied to my Rant earlier and said that he wanted to become the first one to take on the challenge I had made to some tough hombres to quit.
So i went ahead and posted all these things about how his posting had made me stronger and made me stop going to the store to buy the deadly junk. Also I think Chewie answered to my rant and casually said “Nah, just keep posting here, you doing good”, so both of these posts allowed me to continue.
That was the last time I heard from Chewie, i am not sure if its because he thinks I am strong enough and I can do it on my own or if he got pissed cause I made a comment that I had thought he owned stock on the companies he recommended for purchasing fake tobacco. Me and JayP agreed that he does not do it for that reason, he knows that stuff is a tool on the fight against tobacco and Now I know it is true, I ordered some stuff as I mentioned before and it’s helped me with the cravings.
My old man quit smoking after decades of doing it and it has been decades now that he has been quit, so he knows a little about tobacco cessation. After I told him that I ordered some fake stuff to help me with my quit, he said it would be better if I continued cold turkey, he did it like that. I said I think I understand what you are saying, but if this product has nothing addicting I think I would have no trouble leaving it behind after I am bored with it and it would put me further away into the quit, so I told him, some of us aint as strong as you old timers!, He smiles.
Sorry for the long post guys.
Nice post Deepy, as a recovering nicotine addict your post still motivate me!!!
Jeff
Day 76
Long post? Great Post Deepy! I just want to say a couple things to you. I don’t consider myself a veteran yet….but the stuff you feel and are wrestling with in your mind are the same I did, mainly about craving the stuff months after you quit. Being at day 90 you are (as listed above) well qualified to kick the cravings ass to the curb. I do feel like I can keep quit now where I am in my quit. Your father and mine share the same thing with smoking. Mine quit about 16 years ago, after decades of smoking. I did lean on him when I was going through that fucking fog. He said “I went through a lot of crazy stuff mentally when I quit cold turkey”. Minus using the fake dips, that do not have nicotine or tobacco in them, I did quit cold turkey too, you as well. And while I will need to deal with not using this fake stuff someday, I again would rather have this habit than a nicotine/tobacco one. You are still quit.
But let me outline what Chewie did say about fake chews. He said he used them to about day 200 of his quit. Then at or around then, he didn’t feel like he needed them anymore…and said others adopted the same. I used probably a full can a day when I started my quit, I am down to about 3 dips a day of the fake stuff…..so you do begin to taper off the stuff…or use less, I am at least. So I agree with him, use it when you need it and only when you get that “man I wish I could take a dip”. I’m an advocate of the fake dips, so long they are nicotine free….plug away.
I did forget to add…..I am now a professional sunflower seed spitter too now. So I’ve adopted another tool to deal with that oral fixation….which has helped me use less fake chew…just thought I’d throw that out there too.
Sweet post boys! My new title in my life is” a recovering nicotine addict”. Which is so true for me. I am happy to say, for the most part have kicked some ass, but, I will always need to be on guard for the nic bitch.
Thanks for you crazy bastards who have helped me to this point. Day 78
Jayp, deepy(ddd)
Jeff
Jayp
I use a can of smokey maybe every two weeks, I only take a fake dip on weekends now.. Mowing, yard work, and car shows( restore classic cars for fun)
Seeds.. Only for about 3 or 4 days into my quit ,,,,,,, For some reason. Carrots was my thing…
I gained too much weight, but started hiking and swimming… Now I need to drop 15 pounds.
Day #103 Great Posts Guys! Deepy, thanks for the congrats. It feels awesome (Capital A) to have made it this far and I know you’re on that last flight of stairs to the first floor, we’ll see you here shortly! In the meantime, you need to get here and sound off more, I definitley hear the motivational tone in your posts, guys on this board feed of that “dumb shit” (your words), including me. I think you got a hidden talent in your ability to motivate folks through your writings.
Rick, I’m proud you’re still with all of us man, keep it up. Yes, them mind games…..they were pretty dam tough. But well worth it when I look back at it. Like your guitar teacher said, if it were easy, everyone would do it. I truly believe you need to find a saying, a creed, to get you through the real hard times….mine were day 1-30 to 40. And my creed was “This too….shall pass”…Deepy mentioned it was King Salomon….he was indeed credited with it, but the saying was quite older. One of my customers said it to me around day 5 and it stuck. Every dam time I had some anxiety pop up or the fog was almost unbearable….I would recite this in my head and shake it off…much, MUCH easier than said than done…but it was yet another tool I adopted to get through it….a creed! Corny? Yes! Effective? Hell yeah!!
Jeff, your just a few short steps away from Deepy on that staircase to the first floor, proud of you too….it does feel very empowering where you current are right now in your quit….it was for me definitely! I think I was waiting for that fog to pop back up as it said it does above. I think I had one day where I had a few tough moments in the 80 day stretch….but after the living hell I endured in those first 30-40 days….one day was nothing more than a fart in the wind…been there, done that.
Well men, that was my day 103 rambling. Proud of all you guys, I really am. As I mentioned, you all are the definition of WARRIORS! We’ll be checking back in soon!
-JP
Rick
Mind games, no sleep, sweats, it’s the nic bitch, as you know, your stage is all mental. I found day 4-20 maybe the hardest for me, even though, my fog lasted around 30 days.
Just keep on getting thru each day, around day 30, it gets so much better:
Today is day 75, it’s almost hard to believe I have done this, what seemed impossible to quit just a few months ago is now reality:
Anyone reading this that has not quit, don’t let the fear of how hard it is to quit, to continue shoving a fatty in your lip. The fear should be what could be something terrible.
Quitting has actually been an experience I enjoyed, after day 30;
Haha
To all my quit brothers thanks for helping me get this far!
Jeff
Howdy Fellas, How is it going? I am back to kick some ass again.
Well, let’s see, I see Rick is still hanging with us, kick ass dude I knew you could do it.
Jeff, you still on your way too, awesome, now keep on your quest to put the US tobacco Companies out of business.
JayP, you the man!!, You completed your 100 days, that’s kick ass right there. Brothers, that’s our mark, that’s the challenge, I’ll be there in 11 days, then Jeff, then Rick.
Hopefully a stubborn brother that’s been lurking the site and reading upon our Journey away from Hell may want to join us. I hope so, I mean look at Rick he is already out of the Physical cessation symptoms of the withdrawal and into the mind games, screw those!!! they aint real, that’s all they are a big pile of nothing, but you are real, just like Jeff, Jayp, Shiva, myself and the thousands of other brothers going through it.
The accomplishment of the quit is Very real fellas, Now keep up the good fight, the way i see this group is like a platoon of soldiers armed to the teeth with new weapons we pick up everyday and crawling out of this infernal pit of tobacco spit and fire, where we comfortably stewed for years. Our bodies got so comfortable with all this crud in and out of us that it wants it back, but the real us is actually seeing that hole full of crud and recognizing finally from the distance what we are crawling out of.
DDD.
Anybody tired of the mind games yet? Deepy was right this combination of chemicals seems to poke and prod me until it finds my weakest spot. But I’m not buying a can today! I’m tired of thinking about chew!
Just drove by my old go to store for chew before I went to work and yeah I thought about stopping there all morning. I kept on driving though. Its all about forming new positive habits and memories! One more skoal can could mean another 5 10 15 years of this terrible habit so while I really want another chew I don’t want 15000 more.
Day 12